Bargaining Table Comic Strips - Page 68

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

769 Results for Bargaining Table

View 671 - 680 results for bargaining table comic strips. Discover the best "Bargaining Table" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice, #small alice, #kill people, #looking at them, #smiling, #man dies, #scary face

View Transcript

Transcript

A male co-worker says to Alice, "Smile, Alice. It won't hurt." As Alice glares at the co-worker, he grabs at his throat and cries, "Gaaak!!" At a table, eating lunch with Wally and Dilbert, Alice says, "I found out I can kill people by looking at them." Dilbert says, "I wondered why you were smiling."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #positive reinforcement, #addicted, #delivarables, #praised

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice thinks to herself, "I'm addicted to positive reinforcement." Alice continues thinking, "I need some deliverables so I can be praised again." Dilbert watches as Alice reaches for the overhead projector from under the table.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dot com ceo, #no profit, #laid off, #laid off means, #compliment, #baby bottle, #youngsters, #meeting, #firing people, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

DILBERT: DOT-COM CEO: Dilbert sits at the head of a table and children sit in seats around the table. One of the children has a baby bottle at his place. Dilbert says, "We have no profit now and we never will. You're all laid off." The child with the baby bottle asks, "Does anyone know what laid off means?" A young man says, "It must be a compliment." The young man says to Dilbert, "You're pretty laid off yourself, dude." The child offers his baby bottle to Dilbert and says, "Want a hit of this?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no opinion, #spineless, #Opinion, #unnecessary pain, #cry in public

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman are sitting at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "You don't give your opinion on anything. Are you spineless?" Dilbert says, "Maybe you create an environment in which giving an opinion is an invitation to unnecessary pain." The woman exclaims to Dilbert, "Great! You're making me cry in public!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #look like losers, #give numbers, #internal subterfuge, #eighty percent, #vp

View Transcript

Transcript

There are several papers on a table. The Boss says to Dilbert, "We can't show these numbers to our VP. They make us look like losers." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Find something we're doing well and give him those numbers instead." Dilbert, wearing dark glasses and a false moustache, looks on as the VP reads the report and says, "Wow! Our internal subterfuge is up eighty percent!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tight labor market, #complicated tasks, #harder jobs, #dumb employees

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is pointing to a graphic of a person being squeezed in a vise. Dilbert says, "Due to a tight labor market and increasingly complicated tasks.." Dilbert continues, "Harder and harder jobs will be staffed with dumber and dumber employees until the logical limit:" As a table to zombie like employees stare, Dilbert says, "This meeting."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mandatory lunchtime meetings, #life work balance, #high five, #Catbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert and the boss are sitting at a table. Catbert says, "How about mandatory lunchtime meetings?" The boss says, "On the subject of Work-Life Balance!" The boss and Catbert high five each other. Wally and Dilbert peek over a cubicle divider at the the boss, whose hand is bandaged. Wally says, "Uh-oh. He's been high-fiving Catbert again."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trust, #integrity, #teamwork, #warm glow, #unconditional love, #heating vent, #under vent

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss, at a confence table, says, "Our company values are trust, integrity and teamwork." Wally says, "For the first time in my life I feel the warm glow of unconditional love!" Dilbert, pointing up, says, "You're under a heating vent." Wally says, "Oh...well, that's good too."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #weekly wally report, #stock options, #maple, #someone lost more

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss, Wally and Dilbert are at a table. Wally says, "Now for the weekly Wally report." Wally says, "Wally struggled to maintain his morale despite the ninety percent drop in his stock options." Wally continues, "Then he remembered that someone lost much, much, much more that he did."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coworkers naked, #no more donuts, #boredom

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice is sitting at a conference table and thinking, "Maybe I can stave off the boredom by imagining my co-workers naked." Turning to Wally, Alice screams, "Aaagh! No-o-o-0!!!" Alice says to Wally, "No more donuts for you." Wally says, "Hey, don't even kid about that."