Dogbert Comic Strips - Page 68

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Dogbert

View 671 - 680 results for dogbert comic strips. Discover the best "Dogbert" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags outdoors, Dogbert, man

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert walks down the sidewalk humming. A man says, "Hey, Dogbert! Long time no see!" Dogbert covers his ears and says, "Ow!!" Dogbert says, "I've never been good at suffering fools."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, zap, building, anti-social

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. As Dilbert assembles a device, Dogbert says, "I was wondering if you could build a phaser pistol so I can zap the many fools I encounter every day." Dogbert continues, "Nothing lethal, just enough to make them twitch wildly and scream. It would be fun." Dilbert says, "That wouldn't be very nice to the fools." Dogbert replies, "I just think you guys should provide more value to society."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags garbageman, Dogbert, morals, phaser

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to the garbage man, "Dilbert won't build a phaser pistol for me. He thinks it's wrong to zap people for fun." The garbage man replies, "Yeah, that would be wrong . . . Unless the people you zap are themselves immoral, in which case you would be on the side of justice." Dogbert says, "I guess it's academic since I don't have a phaser." The garbage man says, "Here, borrow mine."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags man, outdoors, Dogbert, taser

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on a rock. A man says, "Hey, little dog, smile. It only takes two muscles!" Dogbert zaps the man with a phaser pistol. The man screams. Dogbert says, "That took a few extra muscles, but I think it was worth it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, man, taser, radio traffic

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands at a man's door and says, "I'm looking for the idiot who does the radio traffic reports." The man says, "Speaking of idiots, only an idiot would want to be in this traffic!" Dogbert zaps the man and says, "That's for making me listen to inane segues."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags garbageman, Dogbert, taser, trash, outdoors

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to the garbage man, "Thanks for letting me borrow your phaser. I recharged the batteries." The garbage man says, "I hope you didn't use it in anger." Dogbert replies, "No, I was laughing most of the time. And I probably won't stop wagging until Tuesday." The garbage man says, "Good."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bob, Dilbert, ratbert, email, computer, Dogbert, wedgie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on the desk chair. He says, "The e-mail votes have been tabulated. The will of the people is that Ratbert shall be spared from getting whacked with a magazine." Dilbert says to Ratbert, "I guess there's nothing funny about random cruelty." Bob the Dinosaur gives Dilbert a wedgie and says, "Right! Cruelty is only funny if administered in a proper social context."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, the boss, business meeting, fitness, money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Congratulations, Mister Dogbert. You submitted the lowest bid for creating our corporate fitness program." The Boss continues, "The other bidders wanted money. You're the only one who offered to do it just for the laughs." The Boss continues, "Although I don't see what's so funny about it." Dogbert replies, "Engineers . . . Aerobics . . . Think about it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags outdoors, Dilbert, Dogbert, aerobics

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally and Alice stand in front of Dogbert wearing shorts and t-shirts. Dogbert says, "Skeptics say that a company fitness program will not succeed. Let's do some aerobics and see who's right!" Dilbert and the other engineers hit and kick each other as they try to do aerobics. The employees lie in a pile on the floor. Dilbert says, "The skeptics are right." Dogbert replies, "We usually are."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags ratbert, Dogbert, story, writing

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on his pillow. Ratbert says, "I'm writing a short story for people who don't have much patience." Ratbert reads, "Blah, blah, blah. Whatever, blah, blah, etcetera, etcetera." Ratbert says, "If it's a commercial success, the sequel practically writes itself."