Sit On Rocks Comic Strips - Page 68
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697 Results for Sit On Rocks
View 671 - 680 results for sit on rocks comic strips. Discover the best "Sit On Rocks" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday October 06,
2013
Tags #complaining, #obstinacy, #peer coaching, #trendy, #complain, #insightful questions, #cause problems, #respoinsible
Transcript
Alice: Who's up for some peer coaching? Dilbert: What? Alice: It's the latest thing. Dilbert: Then it must be good. Alice: I'll complain about all of my work problems while you sit there and listen. Then you'll ask insightful questions that will cause me to come up with my own solutions. Dilbert: Okay. Have you considered the possibility that you cause all of your own problems by um... being you? Alice: You're terrible at this But that's not surprise because you're terrible at most things. I hope you die badly. Dilbert: Do I ask another insightful question now?
Tuesday December 24,
2013
Tags #electronic mail, #thinking, #lack of creativity, #choke yourself, #creating ideas
Transcript
Boss: I traced all of our problems back to your lack of creativity. You should be creating ideas that change the course of civilization, but instead, you sit there like a lump. Dilbert: I'm sending you a link that describes fun ways to choke yourself.
Sunday July 20,
2014
Tags #new idea, #dream, #3d glasses, #for real life, #people love 3d, #not movies, #obvious, #ideas
Transcript
CEO: Last night, an idea for a new product came to me in a dream. Dilbert: ICK CEO: 3-D Glasses. Dilbert: To watch movies? CEO: No, real life. Dilbert: So...The glasses would make life in general appear three-dimensional? CEO: Exactly! People Love 3-D Stuff. Dilbert: Im not going to respond to your idea. Im just going to sit here looking three-dimensional. CEO: wait....how are you doing that? Dilbert: Im wearing glasses that make me look 3-D
Saturday December 06,
2014
No More Than Eight People In A Meeting
Tags #autobiography, #executives, #ghost writers, #quote, #quotes, #co author, #meetings, #rules
Transcript
Dilbert: Your rule is that no more than eight people should attend a meeting, so I can't let you sit down. CEO: When did I say that? Dilbert: It was in a book you co-wrote. CEO: I knew I should have skimmed that thing. Dilbert: Your unknown co-author is quite wise.
Saturday December 13,
2014
Text Is More Important Than Dilbert
Tags #cell phones, #distraction, #power, #subversion, #text, #text message, #attention, #pellet of attention, #ignore, #superior, #demonstrate
Transcript
Boss: Hold on, I have a text message that is probably more important than you. I will demonstrate my power over you by handling a text message while you sit there, waiting for a pellet of my attention. Stop texting me! Dilbert: Mmm... pellet.
Wednesday March 25,
2015
Wally Does Economic Babble Talk
Tags #bitcoins, #confusion, #conversation, #economics, #jargon, #success, #the fed
Transcript
Wally: Do you think The Fed should liquidate its Bitcoins or let the dollar float with Libor rates? Boss: Maybe we could just sit quietly until the others arrive. Wally: Success.
Tuesday October 27,
2015
People Get Dumber When Sitting Down
Tags #intelligence, #dumb, #belief, #furniture, #new age, #science, #metaphysics
Transcript
Dilbert: Is it my imagination or do people get dumber when they sit down for a meeting? Or would you say you are equally dumb no matter what you are doing? Boss: Well, I'm no scientist, but I'm pretty sure feng shui is part of the answer.
Thursday November 12,
2015
Boss's Charisma Inspires Wally
Tags #technology, #text, #texting, #distraction, #shout, #diversion, #charm, #excitement, #cheer
Transcript
Boss: (types on his phone). Wally: Go team! Can you turn down your charisma? I can barely sit still over here.
Sunday January 10,
2016
Tags #justice, #trial, #jury duty, #laziness, #lazy, #juror, #legal system
Transcript
Wally: I got called for jury duty. I'll probably be gone for weeks. I think I would be a good juror. As I understand the job, you sit in a chair doing nothing for hours. Boss: You're supposed to pay attention to the trial. Wally: That's what the other eleven people are for. There's a lot of redundancy in the system. Time to serve up some justice.
Monday September 26,
2016
Ceo Sits On His Wallet
Tags #complaining, #perspective, #suffering, #competition
Transcript
CEO: I hate to complain, but it hurts when I sit on my wallet for too long. Asok: I risked an honor killing to pay my rent. CEO: This is why I hate to complain. Asok: I know a hundred ways to eat a spider.