Office Politics Comic Strips - Page 69
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1000 Results for Office Politics
View 681 - 690 results for office politics comic strips. Discover the best "Office Politics" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday January 28,
2019
Documents On Chairs
Tags frustrated, office, office workers, paper
Transcript
Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I hate it when people leave documents on my chair! I will have my revenge by sticking this at the bottom of my biggest pile. Winning.
Tuesday January 29,
2019
New Forms
Tags business, money, office, office workers, efficiency
Transcript
Dilbert: Did you approve my budget request? Boss: No, you used the old form. Dilbert: Do we have new forms? Boss: In hindsight, we should have funded the creation of new budget request forms before we made the old ones obsolete.
Wednesday January 30,
2019
Best Product
Tags criticism, jokes, meetings, office, office workers, sarcasm, presentation
Transcript
Ted: As you can see from this chart, our product has been rated number one for six years in a row. Dilbert: Why does your chart stop four years ago? Ted: I'll bet you don't get invited to a lot of parties. Dilbert: That's just a lucky guess.
Thursday January 31,
2019
Tweaking Variables
Tags business, managers & supervisors, office, office workers, strategy, stupidity
Transcript
Dilbert: I can't get my five-year projections to match what you told the board. Boss: Try tweaking the variables until they do. Dilbert: That would make me a liar. Boss: Nah. In five years it will look like ordinary stupidity.
Friday February 01,
2019
Ten Year Financial Projections
Saturday February 02,
2019
Take The Stairs
Tags birthdays, encouragement, exercise & fitness, health, office, office workers, company, life insurance
Transcript
Boss: The company encourages you to take the stairs instead of the elevator because it is good for your health. Ted: I take the elevator because my life insurance doesn't pay off if I kill myself all at once. Boss: On another topic, we will celebrate birthdays this month with cake in the break room. Ted: Perfect.
Monday February 04,
2019
Robot Has A Cyborg
Tags insults, Kids, office workers, robot, technology, smartphone
Transcript
Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot. Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg. Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.
Sunday February 10,
2019
Tags avoidance, irritation, lunch, office workers, relationships, coworkers
Transcript
Tina: You should meet the new guy in marketing. You two would get along great. I'll set up a lunch. Dilbert: Why? Tina: Because he reminds me of you. Dilbert:That isn't a reason. Tina: Okay, he is free tomorrow for lunch. I'll tell him to meet you in the lobby. Dilbert: I still don't see why the three of us need to go to lunch. Tina: It's just the two of you. I'm busy tomorrow. Man: I hear you're a lot like me. Dilbert: Sadly, yes.
Monday February 11,
2019
Co2 Scrubbers
Tags boss, earth, inventions, office workers, plants, technology, humans
Transcript
Boss: Dilbert, I want you to invent a device that can scrub 100% of the CO2 out of the air. Dilbert: 100%??? That would kill every plant in the world. Do you know what that would mean for humans? Boss: Does the answer involve salad?
Wednesday February 13,
2019
Lower The Price
Tags boss, business, office, office workers, prices, negotiate
Transcript
Dilbert: My boss will yell at me if I don't negotiate a lower price. What can you do for me? Man: I lowered the price by ten percent before I showed it to you. Dilbert: I have no way of verifying your claim. Man: Neither does your boss. Problem solved.


