Office Plants Comic Strips - Page 69

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772 Results for Office Plants

View 681 - 690 results for office plants comic strips. Discover the best "Office Plants" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #argument, #debates, #frustration, #office workers, #evidence

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Man: ...And that's what I think about the issue. Dilbert: Here's a Youtube video proving that everything you believe is wrong. Notice this isn't just an opinion. It is a video of the entire event you just claimed did not happen. I'm sending you a link to ten media stories debunking your version of events. Having now proved how wrong you are. Would you like to retract everything you said about it? Man: Why can't you admit when you are wrong? Dilbert: Because I'm not wrong!!!

Health Problems

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Health Problems  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 18, 2019's comic on:


Tags #age, #complaining, #health, #office, #office workers

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Alice: Do me a favor and never put me on a project with people over the age of forty. They waste the first fifteen minutes of every meeting talking about their health problems. Boss: Did you say something? I can't hear you over my tinnitus.

Helping Ted

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Helping Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2019's comic on:


Tags #engineering, #frustration, #help, #office, #office workers

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Boss: I need you to help Ted on his project. He seems to be struggling. Dilbert: That would doom two projects - mine would suffer from neglect, and Ted would re-bungle anything I fix. Boss: Maybe Ted can help you on your project. Dilbert: Gaaaaa!!!

Adjust The Data

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Adjust The Data - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 20, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business ethics, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #office, #research, #tests, #data

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Dilbert: The test data doesn't support our plan. Boss: We know our plan is brilliant, so just adjust the data to support it. Dilbert: You mean falsify the data. Boss: Let's not get hung up on the definition of things.

Darkest Before The Dawn

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Darkest Before The Dawn - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 22, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers

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Alice: Our product pipeline looks dismal. Boss: It's always darkest before the dawn. Alice: You're comparing product development to the solar system. I don't know what to do with that. Boss: What would Jesus do?

Hard Work Is The Key

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Hard Work Is The Key - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 2019's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #office, #office workers, #success, #difficult

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Boss: The key to your personal success is hard work. Dilbert: Was it hard for you to learn that? Boss: No, it was easy. Dilbert: Do you mind if I get my advice from someone who worked it at harder?

Mandatory Training

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Mandatory Training - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #avoidance, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #training

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Boss: You haven't finished the mandatory compliance training modules. Alice: I'm waiting for a strategic time to do them. Boss: Oh, okay. Want to go to lunch? Alice: I would love to, but I have training modules to do.

Have To Think About It

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Have To Think About It - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #business ethics, #idea, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers

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Dilbert: Do you like my idea? Boss: I need to think about it. Dilbert: You mean you plan to wait a few weeks and then act as if it was your idea? Boss: Now that idea I like right away.

Dilbert And Brainwashing

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Dilbert And Brainwashing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 04, 2019's comic on:


Tags #avoidance, #employees, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

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Boss: Why is your employee engagement so low? Dilbert: Because I'm relatively immune to brainwashing. Boss: Okay, I didn't think you knew.

Asok's Employee Engagement

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Asok's Employee Engagement - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #work, #attitude, #expectations

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Boss: Asok, your employee engagement has been a bit soft this quarter. I expect a higher level of irrational enthusiasm for the endless string of thankless tasks you call your job. Asok: How's this? Boss: I also want to see an unnatural preference for work over leisure.