Funny Noise Comic Strips - Page 7
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187 Results for Funny Noise
View 61 - 70 results for funny noise comic strips. Discover the best "Funny Noise" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday May 12,
2011
Tags annoyance, doctors' offices, medicines, whiny idiots, pill, doctor, exam room, office, treadmill, pass out, medical
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm sick of listening to whiny idiots. Do you have a pill for that? Doctor: I sure do! I took a handful of them this morning and I feel great in spite of your complaining! How funny would it be if I make you run on a treadmill until you pass out?
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday January 15,
2011
Tags cruelty, managers & supervisors, couldn't be worse, bad idea, Funny, project is bad idea, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "How's everything going?" Dilbert says, "It couldn't be worse." Dilbert says, "I was the only person who said this project is a bad idea. Then you assigned it to me." The Boss says, "It's funnier when I make them say it." Dilbert says, "Grrrr"
Friday February 18,
2011
Tags employees, engineers, revenge, loud talker, chronic faltualator, seating arrangements, cubicle arrangements, sound, noise, business
Transcript
Office relocation Alice says, "Your floor plan puts me between a loud talker and a chronic flatulator." Tina says, "I could move you to a cubicle between a guy who clears his throat all day and a woman who laughs too much." Alice says, "Is this because I once said you aren't smart enough to be an engineer?" Tina says, "Look what I engineered?" Office Relocation
Thursday May 26,
2011
Tags blaming, quarreling, work independantly, close eyes, fall back, better than other people
Transcript
Dogbert: Today you'll learn how to work independently. In this exercise, I want you to put your arms at you side, close your eyes, and fall backward. Noise: Thud thud thud. Dogbert: And it's still better than working with other people.
Friday July 01,
2011
Tags anger, marriage, fist of work, feel the wrath, totally legal, eye canons, single, higher setting, politically incorrect, relationships
Transcript
Alice: I have been informed that it is politically incorrect to use my fist of death at work. So fell the wrath of my totally legal eye cannons! Noise: Budddabudda!! Asok: Gaa!! Alice: Oops. I didn't know you were single. Married guys can take a higher setting.
Sunday June 19,
2011
Tags embarrassment, walkways, minute, meeting, walk and talk, barely concentrate, prove underling wrong, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you have a minute? Boss: I'm on my way to a meeting. Follow me. We'll walk and talk. Dilbert: I don't see how this can possibly work. You can barely concentrate when you're sitting perfectly still. When you add the extra complexity of walking, it's like asking a squirrel to land a 747. Boss: Must... prove underling... wrong... Noise: BONK! Dilbert: I didn't know that being right could feel so good.
Sunday July 24,
2011
Tags gadgets, scientific equipment, data center, lights out, eliminate problems, moving cables, power cords, ruining everything, speakerphone, humans are germs, science
Transcript
Voice: The data center is evolving into a "lights out" operation. Employees will no longer be allowed in the data center. We hope to eliminate all of the problems that humans cause by moving cables, unplugging power cords, and ruining everything with their dirt and static. Dilbert: He makes it sound as if the data center is alive and we humans are nothing but germs. Alice: By the way, who called this meeting and who's on the speakerphone? Dilbert: Are you... the data center? Noise: CLICK. Dilbert: I have a bad feeling about this.
Wednesday August 24,
2011
Tags anxiety, conversation, discussion, valuable input, hear alarm
Transcript
Boss: When are you meeting with the customer? I'll join you to add my valuable input. Noise: Slurp. Dilbert: Does everyone hear that alarm or is it only in my head? Boss: I can stay all afternoon.
Friday September 09,
2011
Tags keep brain out, laziness, long and complicated, technical recommendation, thinking, make decision
Transcript
Dilbert: Did you read my technical recommendation? Boss: No. It's too long and complicated. Dilbert: How do you plan to make a decision without reading it? Boss: I'll use my gut. Dilbert: It's probably a good idea to keep your brain out of this. Boss: Quiet! It's saying something. Noise: GROWL.
Wednesday September 14,
2011
Tags correspondence, electronic mail, genius, unfinished product, writing, hallmark of genius, unexpected use of time
Transcript
Boss: You didn't answer my email. Dilbert: I tried to read it but the signal-to-noise ratio was too low. Boss: So it's sort of a technical problem? Dilbert: Okay.