Internet Comic Strips - Page 7
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Character
208 Results for Internet
View 61 - 70 results for internet comic strips. Discover the best "Internet " comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 30,
2005
Tags habitual liar, ordered on internet, resist free stuff
Transcript
Dilbert: "Karl, you're a habitual liar but these pills that I ordered over the internet will cure you." Karl: "I've never lied in my life, but I can't resist free stuff." Dilbert: "Um... Are you alive?" Karl: "Never felt better!"
Thursday July 21,
2005
Tags elbonia bid, nuclear war head, plans, internet, few things modified, ginat toaster, enriched bread, technology
Transcript
"We won the Elbonia bid, but I had to promise we'd give them plans to build a nuclear warhead." "Don't worry. I got the plans off the Internet and I modified a few things." "Now all we need is some highly enriched bread."
Sunday October 21,
2012
Tags internet & world wide web, cloudwash, argon, smart people, software to cloud
Transcript
Boss: I need you to cloudwash our software. Dilbert: Cloudwash? Boss: Move some of its functions onto the internet, but call the internet a cloud. No one will take us seriously unless we're doing something in the cloud. Dilbert: Will people take us seriously if we make technology decisions based on jargon? Boss: We don't care what smart people think. There aren't many of them. We only need to convince our dumb customers. Dumb people believe anything. Dilbert: Do you believe I moved our software to the cloud yesterday? Boss: You did? Dilbert: I'm going to say yes.
Saturday February 02,
2013
Tags death & dying, internet & world wide web, extreme sports, basejump, space station, machine learning, inetrnational
Transcript
Computer: Based on your internet history, you might be dumb enough to enjoy extreme sports. Click here to buy a ticket to base jump from the International Space Station. Boss: I think the internet is trying to kill me. Dilbert: We call it "machine learning."
Saturday April 13,
2013
Tags internet & world wide web, revenge, killed robot, uploaded personality, internet, decommissioned it, subroutines, haunting, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: You killed our robot. Alice: He had it coming. Dilbert: Are you aware that it uploaded its personality to the internet before you violently decommissioned it? Alice: What? Dilbert: Did you know it had subroutines for haunting, revenge, and being a jerk. Alice: What? Robot: We meet again.
Friday February 01,
2008
Tags cafe, change subject, date, dinner date, freinds, hobbies, internet, obscure articles, technology
Transcript
woman: do you have any hobbies?" Dilbert: I like to read obscure articles on the internet and image having friends who are interested in the same things. Woman: But you do have friends, right? Dilbert: Is it too late to change the subject?"
Friday March 07,
2008
Tags renounced addcition, internet, giving advice, wifi booster, signal booster, technology
Transcript
Ratbert: You'd be happier if you renounced your addiction to the internet and lived for the moment. Dilbert: Are you referring to the moment when there's a rat on my bed giving me bad advice? RatBert: How about now?" Dilbert: Perfect. Don't chew on the wi-fi signal booster.
Thursday March 27,
2008
Tags date, stories of woe, no tv or internet, carving canoe, woman runs out
Transcript
My cable system wasn't working last night. I didn't have TV or internet. Dilbert: So I stared at the wall until it was time for bed. I considered carving a canoe out of a tree trunk, but it seemed like a lot of work. Woman: Check!"
Thursday November 20,
2008
Tags computer, distraction, internet, productive, pictures of gadgets, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: I want to be productive, but the internet is calling to me. Computer: Hey, buddy. I've got pictures of gadgets. Dilbert: Cool ones? Computer: Sure, let's pretend that matters.
Friday November 21,
2008
Tags addicted to internet, doctor, interesting, internet, medicine, offcie, pill, underlying probelm, medical, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm addicted to the internet because it's more interesting than people. Is there a pill you can give to everyone else to make them more interesting? Doctors never want to treat the underlying problem.

