Anti Itch Lotion Comic Strips - Page 7

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75 Results for Anti Itch Lotion

View 61 - 70 results for anti itch lotion comic strips. Discover the best "Anti Itch Lotion" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #human resources, #complaint, #cat, #lunch, #clean room, #loofah, #french bread, #itch back, #animals, #business

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Catbert says, "I'm getting a lot of complaints about you eating your lunch in the clean room." Catbert says, "And people don't like it when you use a loofah in there." The Boss says, "That's my french bread. And I can't help it if my back itches."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prices, #confusing, #explain, #arms out, #piece of paper, #compete, #angry, #spank, #logical

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Dilbert says, "Is it my imagination or is your pricing intentionally confusing?" Coworker says, "It's intentionally confusing." Coworker says, "That way you can't compare our prices to our competitors' prices." Coworker says, "Our competitors do the same thing. It's called confusopoly." Coworker says, "We all get our fair share of confused customers and we don't need to lower our prices to compete." Coworker says, "We use the profits from our anti-competitive behavior to fun innovation." Coworker says, "So don't ruin a good system by trying to understand what you're buying." Dilbert says, "That almost sounds reasonable." Coworker says, "Now spank yourself and thank me!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #talk over people, #jumbled typ face, #escalate, #lisening, #fun part

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Dogbert says, "I've decided to escalate my anti-social behavior from not listening, to actively talking over other people." Dilbert says, "How can you enjoy the conversation of others if you don't listen?" Dogbert says, "This could be one of the best ideas I've ever had." Dogbert says, "It all came together when I realized that listening isn't the fun part."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ineffective, #nemesis, #physics of work, #quarreling

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Dilbert: My old nemesis retired, so I asked Randy to take over that function because he's ineffective at everything he does. Coworker: Huh? Dilbert: The physics of work required that each employee be matched with an anti-employee called a nemesis. Coworker: I don't know who my nemesis is. Wally: Uh-oh. You got a hider. They're the worst.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #anti co worker, #padding, #noise canceling, #headphones, #business

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Dilbert: I'm waring my anti-co-worker suit to work today. It has noise-canceling headphones, blinders, and padding so I can't feel taps on my shoulder. Headphones: Mr. Watson-- don't come here-- I don't need you. Dilbert: Heh heh.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #illness, #stress, #culture of consulting fiorms, #flat linig, #false larm, #graphs

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Consultant: I haven't slept since October because the culture of consulting firms is anti-health. I'm flat-lining! False alarm. I'm back. Who wants to make some graphs?

Love Me For My Mind

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Love Me For My Mind - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #love, #priorities, #relationships, #vanilla scented lotion, #mind

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Woman: I want a guy who loves me for me, and not for the way I look... or the things I do. Dilbert: That doesn't leave me much to work with. Can I love you for your money and your vanilla-scented body lotion? Woman: You could love me for my mind. Dilbert: That might have worked two minutes ago.

Day Of Arranging Zeroes And Ones

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Day Of Arranging Zeroes And Ones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anti-social, #communication, #engineers, #happiness, #interaction, #introvert, #social interaction, #socializing, #psychology

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Dilbert: Yay! I have another full day of doing nothing but rearranging zeros and ones. You know it will be a good day when there is no human interaction on the schedule. Tina: How's your day going? Dilbert: Well, it started good...

Dilbert Is Not Anti Social

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Dilbert Is Not Anti Social - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #antisocial, #introvert, #judgement, #extrovert, #judging, #criticism, #isolation, #misanthrope, #misanthropy

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Tina: Why are you antisocial? Dilbert: I do't oppose the concept of social behavior. I just don't enjoy being with people. Tina: That's dumb. Dilbert: Case in point.

Dogbert Advises Dilbert On Escaping

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Dogbert Advises Dilbert On Escaping - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #identity, #hacker, #hacking, #government, #manhunt, #technology, #money, #ruse, #trick, #greed, #betrayal

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Dilbert: The government threatened to kill me if I don't sell them my anti-hacker app. Dogbert: You should change your identity, give me everything you own, and move to an undisclosed location. Dilbert: Will we have a secret way to stay in contact? Dogbert: You're becoming a burden.