Best Engineers Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

484 Results for Best Engineers

View 61 - 70 results for best engineers comic strips. Discover the best "Best Engineers" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #ted, #business project, #business meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table with a man from marketing. The man says, "You engineers have done NOTHING on my project. You just keep saying I haven't given you sufficient requirements!" The man throws his arms up in frustration and says, "I don't know what else you need and you won't tell me what you need!! Is this just your way of avoiding work??!" Wally replies, "I'll bet you regret choosing marketing as a career path." Dilbert adds, "It looks like a lot of work."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #ratbert, #neuroscience

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Ratbert sit on the hassock. Dogbert asks, "Ratbert, did you know that your brain automatically coordinates millions of activities every second?" Dogbert says, "Imagine if it got just a little bit confused - all those neurons firing randomly . . ." Ratbert waves his arms and legs uncontrollably. Dogbert says, "You don't add much to a conversation, but you're easily the best listener I've ever met." Ratbert screams as he falls off the hassock.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 1993's comic on:


Tags #restaurant, #Dilbert, #woman, #waiter, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, ". . . So I knew it was either a layer three protocol error or else it was time to recalibrate the scope." Dilbert continues, "Ha ha! I'll avoid the obvious pun about D-channel packet addressing!" The waiter wrestles with the woman for her knife. Dilbert says, "I don't think she's done with her knife." The waiter says, "I know. I lost three engineers this way."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 11, 1993's comic on:


Tags #business meeting, #Promotion, #Dogbert, #executive man, #management

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and several executives sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "Thank you all for coming to this emergency board meeting." Dogbert continues, "As you know, all promotions to senior management are based on hair. I think we all agree this is the best system." Dogbert lifts the president's toupee with a pointer and continues, "But have you noticed that I have a rich lustrous coat, whereas our current president gets a little outside help?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #executive man, #business meeting, #assistants

View Transcript

Transcript

An executive says, "The motion is approved. Dogbert is our new company president because he has the best hair." Dogbert says to a man who follows him taking notes, ". . . Bulldoze the employee cafeteria and put in my helicopter pad . . . And I need a few office improvements . . ." Dogbert points to the floor in front of his desk and says to the assistant, "We need a trap door here, but it won't be funny unless you can give me some 'flushing' sounds."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 26, 1993's comic on:


Tags #ratbert, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #insults, #best friend, #verbal, #abuse, #order, #cement, #friendship, #moron

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: Dogbert insults you all the time. And you treat him like your best friend. Obviously, I need to give you some verbal abuse in order to cement our bond of love and friendship. Dilbert: You're an idiot.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #business meeting, #fitness, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands on a chair across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Congratulations, Mister Dogbert. You submitted the lowest bid for creating our corporate fitness program." The Boss continues, "The other bidders wanted money. You're the only one who offered to do it just for the laughs." The Boss continues, "Although I don't see what's so funny about it." Dogbert replies, "Engineers . . . Aerobics . . . Think about it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 04, 1993's comic on:


Tags #outdoors, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #aerobics

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally and Alice stand in front of Dogbert wearing shorts and t-shirts. Dogbert says, "Skeptics say that a company fitness program will not succeed. Let's do some aerobics and see who's right!" Dilbert and the other engineers hit and kick each other as they try to do aerobics. The employees lie in a pile on the floor. Dilbert says, "The skeptics are right." Dogbert replies, "We usually are."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 09, 1994's comic on:


Tags #engineers, #good tatse, #home to change, #shut up wally, #casual dress

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I realize that casual dress day isn't easy for you engineers.... The boss; But you've exceeded the bounds of good taste. Ive got to send you home to change. Dilbert: Shut up wally. wally: I heard they were back! I swear!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1994's comic on:


Tags #no raise, #engineers wuit, #the goal, #reduce headcount, #smart people leave, #organize pot luck

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "I'm telling you - if nobody gets a raise, half the engineers will quit!" The Boss: "That's the goal. We're trying to reduce headcount by fifty percent." Dilbert: "But all the smart people will leave!" Dilbert: "Would you mind organizing a goodbye potluck lunch for them?"