Dumb Woman Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

696 Results for Dumb Woman

View 61 - 70 results for dumb woman comic strips. Discover the best "Dumb Woman" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1990's comic on:


Tags #dilbert's, #ego, #porsche, #woman, #Dilbert, #dating, #bar

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Nice toupee. Dilbert's Ego: Thanks. It's the, "Roy Orbison," model. I am now ready to hit the dating scene. Woman at Bar: Really? You drive a porsche? Dilbert's Ego: It's red... But enough about me.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #Dogs, #neighbor, #global warming, #acid rain, #mad dog, #national debt, #carnivore, #ozone, #garbage, #crisis

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading the paper. Dogbert says, "I'm bored. I'm going to scare strangers." Dilbert replies, "Enjoy." Dogbert walks out of the house thinking, "Luckily, lots of people are afraid of dogs." Dogbert stands on the sidewalk and says to a passer by, "Hey mister, I've got rabies!!" The man replies, "I'm only afraid of global warming." Dogbert stands in front of a woman and shouts, "Pit bull! Pit bull!" The woman says, "Save it . . . I'm only afraid of acid rain." Dogbert shouts at a man, "Mad dog! Mad dog!" The man says, "Sorry, I only fear the national debt." Dogbert shouts at a boy carrying a skateboard, "Wild carnivore!" The boy replies, "Chill out, dog dude. I'm only scared of the hole in the ozone layer." Another man says, ". . . Garbage crisis." Dogbert says, "People scare me."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 1990's comic on:


Tags #woman, #single, #clues, #hair

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Clues from women's hair." An arrow points at a woman with long hair and a caption says, "This woman is single." An arrow points at a woman with short hair and a caption says, "The same woman, now married." An arrow points at a woman with bags under her eyes and hair standing on end and a caption says, "Married, two kids."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #widow, #johnson, #missus, #devoured, #automatic, #denture, #invention, #building, #laugh

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands at a woman's door and asks, "Are you Widow Johnson . . . Uh, I mean 'Missus' Johnson?" Dilbert says, "I'm afraid your husband was devoured by the automatic denture invention we were building." Dilbert continues, "Some day we'll look back at this and laugh." The woman looks shocked.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #judy, #dog, #blind, #dates, #fetching, #flowers, #woman

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds a bouquet of flowers as he rings a doorbell and thinks, "I'm always nervous on blind dates." A dog in a dress answers the door and says, "Hi, I'm Judy! You must be Dilbert." Dilbert says, "Hi . . ." Judy asks, "How do I look?" Dilbert replies, "Um . . . fetching."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #trapped, #dog's, #body, #operation, #electrolysis, #costs

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a dog in a dress sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert thinks, "That is absolutely the LAST blind date." Judy says, ". . . Then I realized . . ." Judy continues, "I'm a woman trapped in a dog's body . . . So, now I'm saving for a species change operation." Dilbert asks, "Is it expensive?" Judy replies, "Well, you can imagine the electrolysis costs alone."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 09, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #judy, #blind, #date, #woman, #friends, #Dogs, #body, #dog, #dating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Judy, "To be honest, Judy, I wouldn't have agreed to this blind date . . ." Dilbert continues, ". . . If I had known you were a woman trapped in a dog's body." Judy, a dog in a dress, looks sad. Judy says, "Oh, right, and this is the part where you say 'Let's be friends, but maybe I could pet you sometimes.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 13, 1991's comic on:


Tags #dog, #Dilbert, #donald trump, #ugly, #single, #male, #associated, #avoid, #eye, #contact, #horror, #maiden, #sacrifice, #drew, #straws, #marry

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "It is the most feared and hated creature on earth." The caption says, "Not a dinosaur." Bob the Dinosaur growls. The caption says, "Not a rabid dog." Dogbert asks, "Rabid?" The caption says, "Not Donald Trump." Donald Trump wears a tuxedo. The caption says, "It is the 'ugly single male.'" Dilbert holds his arms out. The caption says, "Other males fear being associated with him." Dilbert says, "Hi, guys!" Two men run away from him. The caption says, "Women avoid eye contact and flee in horror." Dilbert asks, "Anybody free for lunch?" One woman puts her head down and covers her face. Another runs away. The caption says, "Only a maiden sacrifice can end the horror." A woman tells Dilbert, "We drew straws; I have to marry you."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #museum, #tazmanian, #woogat, #silk, #cheap, #polyester, #shirts, #wear, #gift, #shop

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert leads a man and a woman through the museum. Dogbert says, "'Dogbert's Museum of the Strange and Amazing' is the only place you can find . . ." Dogbert continues, ". . . A shirt woven entirely from a single thread of Tazmanian woogat silk." The man says, "It looks like the cheap polyester shirts that I wear." Dogbert says, "In that case, this is the gift shop."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #museum, #d.b. cooper, #hijacked, #demanded, #money, #parachute, #jumped, #robbing

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert holds a drapery cord and says to a man and a woman, "My museum is the only place you can see the remains of D. B. Cooper." Dogbert continues, "Cooper hijacked a jet, demanded money and a parachute, then jumped." Dogbert opens the curtain and says, "He learned that you should never get your parachutes from the same people you're robbing." A man's legs and a backpack are inside the display case.