Hope For A Hug Comic Strips - Page 7
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340 Results for Hope For A Hug
View 61 - 70 results for hope for a hug comic strips. Discover the best "Hope For A Hug" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday January 07,
1996
Tags feeling of doom, room mate, Dilbert, fiancee department, budget, square footage
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "Why do I have a feeling of impending doom?" The Boss peeks into Dilbert's cubicle. The Boss says, "Good news!" Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh." The Boss says, "You won't have to spend another lonely day in this tiny cubicle." Dilbert asks, "I'm getting an office?" The Boss replies, "Better! You're getting a roommate!" Dilbert shouts, "Why??? We've got plenty of empty cubicles! Our company owns the whole building!" The Boss says, "The finance department charges my budget for the square footage we use." Dilbert looks over the cubicle wall and says to the Boss, "It's a false savings! You're hurting the company!" The Boss walks away thinking, "All I hear is a faint buzzing." Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "Oh, well. How bad could it be?" A man wearing a cowboy hat and carrying a can of beans and a radio says, "I hope you like baked beans and square-dancing as much as I do!"
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday January 24,
1996
Tags test new invention, dirty pictures, internet, youthful curioisty, technical brillainace, eyeballs, technology
Transcript
Alice and Dilbert stand behind a little boy who sits at a desk. Dilbert says, "Matt, your job is to test my new invention that blocks kids from seeing dirty pictures on the Internet." As Matt uses the Internet, Dilbert tells Alice, "His youthful curiosity is no match for my technical brilliance." Matt stops typing and stares at the screen. Dilbert says to Alice, "I hope that wasn't the sound of eyeballs getting really big."
Thursday February 22,
1996
Tags elbonia, check software, under contract, documentation, elbonian language, wiring easy, hope to read
Transcript
The caption says, "Somewhere in Elbonia." Dilbert says to two Elbonians, "I've been assigned to check the software you're writing for us under contract." One Elbonian says, "The documentation is written in our own Elbonian language." The other asks, "Is that a problem?" Dilbert says, "That's better than I'd hoped. I was afraid nobody here knew how to write." An Elbonian responds, "Writing is easy. Someday we hope to read, too."
Monday March 18,
1996
Tags intern asok, sturdier than last, staple rmover, pass the intern
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert and Alice, "Hey, everybody. Meet our new intern, Asok." Alice picks up Asok and says, "I hope this one's sturdier than the last one." Wally shouts over the cubicle walls, "My staple remover is broken. Somebody toss that intern to me!"
Monday April 08,
1996
Tags review board, fist of death, alice, wally no work, nostradamus, alice punches wally
Transcript
The Boss, Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "The executive review board meeting is canceled. I hope you didn't work too hard preparing for it." Alice clenches her teeth and thinks, "Must . . . control fist . . . of . . . death . . ." Wally says, "Unlike Alice, I saw it coming and did no work whatsoever." Alice punches Wally and his head collapses into his shirt. She asks, "Did you see THAT coming, Nostradamus?" Dilbert asks, "What does this do to headcount?"
Monday April 29,
1996
Tags Catbert, hr director, employee oreinetation, glimmer, mandatory training video
Transcript
Catbert stands behind Wally's desk and says, "I've come to give you 'employee orientation,' Wally." Wally says, "But I've worked here for years." Catbert says, "You still have a glimmer of hope. You'll have to watch this mandatory training video." Wally sits in front of a television and VCR. The video begins, "So, you still have hope . . ." Catbert massages Wally's temples and says, "Relax . . . Let it go."
Tuesday May 14,
1996
Tags after merger, reduce staff, redundant, employees, evaluated, buying company, bald guy, steal office furniture, business
Transcript
Alice, Wally, Dilbert and a man from the buying company sit at a conference table. The man says, "After the merger, we'll reduce staff in areas that are redundant." Wally says, "I hope the employees of this company will be evaluated fairly compared to those in the buying company." The man says, "We already have a bald guy." Dilbert asks, "Does your steal office furniture, too?"
Thursday June 20,
1996
Tags quality college, clown college, prerequisite, secretaries day, angry clown
Transcript
The Boss says to his secretary, "Carol, I asked you to enroll me in the Quality College, but the confirmation says Clown College." Carol says, "It's a prerequisite course." Carol thinks, "This is gonna cost me on Secretaries Day." The Boss walks away saying, "I hope it's okay to be an angry clown."
Monday June 24,
1996
Tags new objectoves, achievable, objectives approved, measurable
Transcript
Alice hands the Boss a document and says, "Here's a draft of my new objectives. I tried to make them achievable." The Boss reads, "No matter how stupid my co-workers are, I will not punch a hole in anyone's torso, rip out a vital organ and keep it in my cubicle as a warning to others." Outside the Boss's office, Wally says to Dilbert, "I hope she gets those objectives approved." Inside the office, Alice yells, "Yes! It's measurable!"
Tuesday July 30,
1996
Tags reform tax code, idiots, have pets, define idiots, pay taxes
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a stage and says to an audience, "Vote for me and I will reform the tax code so that only idiots have to pay taxes!" The crowd cheers and chants Dogbert's name. Dilbert sits on the couch and Dogbert sits on the armrest. Dogbert says, "I hope nobody asks me to define 'idiots.'" Dilbert says, ". . . So, under your plan I wouldn't pay ANY taxes, right?"