Time Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Time

View 61 - 70 results for time comic strips. Discover the best "Time" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 20, 1990's comic on:


Tags #judicial proceedings, #lawyer, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hypothetical, #hypocracy, #jury duty, #standing, #less, #people, #executioner, #client

View Transcript

Transcript

The defense lawyer says, "Okay, let's say that, hypothetically, my client did kill those people . . ." His client is holding an ax and wearing an executioner's hat. The attorney says to Dilbert and the other members of the jury, "Chances are that it was nobody you know." The lawyer continues, "And the next time you're standing in a long line, ask yourself: 'Am I better off now that there are less people?'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 18, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #armchair, #foot, #time, #reach, #outlet, #cord, #hose, #grandfather, #invented, #clean

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert struggles with a vacuum cleaner. He thinks, "What idiot invented the canister vacuum cleaner?" Dogbert thinks, "I can only do about a foot at a time . . ." Dogbert pushes the vacuum cleaner and thinks, "Then I have to push this thing another foot." Dogbert turns to the reader and says, "Notice the tiny wheels which are designed to roll on any surface except carpet." Dogbert holds the electrical plug and thinks, "Now I can't reach the outlet." Dogbert thinks, "Then I get hopelessly tangled in the cord and hose." Dilbert enters the room and says, "Hi, Dogbert. Did I ever tell you that my grandfater invented the canister vacuum cleaner?" Dogbert says, "Come closer." Dogbert uses the vacuum cleaner to suck Dilbert's clothes off his body. Dilbert is left wearing only his underwear. Dilbert says, "That's probably why I never mentioned it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 25, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #lab, #model, #automatic, #dentures, #program, #eat, #meat, #loaf, #asleep, #boss, #johnson

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and the Boss stand in the laboratory. Dilbert says, "This is the first lab model of automatic dentures." Dilbert explains, "You can program them to eat a meat loaf for you while you sleep . . . Quite a little time saver." Inside the lab, the Boss asks, "Weren't you working with Johnson?" Dilbert replies, "Ooh . . . Bad news about Johnson, sir."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 12, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #sheep, #rancher, #worked, #asleep, #count, #sleep study, #Wally

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Wally stand in front of the coffee machine. Wally says, "I was a sheep rancher before I worked here." Dilbert asks, "How many sheep did you have?" Wally says, "I'm not sure . . ." Wally continues, "Every time I tried to count them, I feel asleep."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #great, #things, #dog, #nap, #time, #want, #tired, #hate, #life, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert thinks, "One of the great things about being a dog is that we can take a nap any time we want." Dogbert continues thinking, "Sometimes we do it because we're tired." Dogbert lies on his back as Dilbert walks by carrying a briefcase. Dogbert thinks, "But mostly, we do it to make you hate your life."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #japan, #favoite, #animals, #remember, #calisthenics, #shark

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Wally and Dilbert carrying costumes. The Boss says, "On my recent business trip to Japan, I learned that Japanese workers dress as their favorite animals to boost productivity." Wally wears a beaver costume and Dilbert wears a dolphin costume. In Japan, a group of workers laugh as one man says, "Ooh-ooh . . . And remember the time we told them we all do calisthenics?!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 24, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #arms, #Dogbert, #weights, #lifting, #automatically, #muscles, #stick, #latin, #name, #armpits, #straight, #time, #good

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds his arms away from his body. He asks Dogbert, "Notice anything different?" Dogbert replies, "You're holding your arms out like this." Dilbert replies, "I've been lifting weights!" Dilbert continues, "My arms do this automatically because of the muscles." Dogbert asks, "What muscles would make your arms stick out?" Dilbert replies, "Obviously, it's some sort of armpit muscle. I don't know the Latin name." Dilbert puts his arms over his head and says, "I'm going to keep at it until I have huge armpits and I have to keep my arms straight up all the time." Dogbert asks, "Why are you doing this?" Dilbert replies, "I just want to look good."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 08, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hero, #suit, #identity, #secret, #super, #powers, #acquire

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I made a super hero suit for myself." Dogbert asks, "Why?" Dilbert puts the suit on as he says, "You never know when you might accidentally acquire super powers. It happens all the time." Dilbert, who is now wearing a suit with a cape and a letter "D" on the front, continues, "This way, my identity can remain a secret." Dogbert says, "I suddenly see why that's so important."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 13, 1991's comic on:


Tags #physics, #easy, #time, #cannon, #speed, #light, #rotating, #donut

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Physics made easy." Dilbert says, "Today's lesson is 'time.'" Dilbert points at a diagram and says, "Imagine a donut, fired from a cannon at the speed of light while rotating." Dilbert continues, "Time is like that, except without the cannon and the donut."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #the boss, #business, #consultant, #credibility, #person, #speak, #slower

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Why should I hire you as my business consultant?" Dogbert replies, "I have credibility because I don't work for your company. No smart person would work here full-time." The Boss says, "I work here full-time." Dogbert says, "Sorry. I'll try to speak slower."