Your Fired Comic Strips - Page 7

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136 Results for Your Fired

View 61 - 70 results for your fired comic strips. Discover the best "Your Fired" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2004's comic on:


Tags #involuntary sepration, #payroll, #fired, #can't touch anything, #way of saying fired

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"Ted, you're going to experience an involuntary separation from payroll." "I'm fired." "No-o-o-o. It's just that you won't be part of the payroll system." "And you're not allowed to touch anything."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 23, 2004's comic on:


Tags #profits down, #sales department, #warhouse, #book

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The boss: "Profits are down, so we fired the sales department to reduce costs." "This strategy heavily depends on people driving to our warehouse and begging for our products." "Do you think I should write a book?" Dilbert: "I'd try reading one first."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 2004's comic on:


Tags #rat, #meeting, #walls spot, #seat filler, #proedcest day, #career work out, #look at me now, #fired, #business

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Ratbert: Wally is in the men's room. I've accepted a position as his seat filler. This is the proudest day of my life. I never ingrained that my career would work out so well, I want to scream to the world " look at name now" allyL false alarm. you're fired.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 2004's comic on:


Tags #stock investing, #valuable data, #project on schedule, #refines data, #ceo, #accountants, #nanotaechnology, #discount brokerage, #investors, #secret society, #donald trumps

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dogcart explains stock investing Dogbert: pay attention. First, employees provide data. Th boss: is your project on schedule? Wally: I didn't know I had a project. A Manager refines the data. The boss: we're on schedule. The CEO gives visibility to analysts. CEO: no problems whatsoever. Accountants publish bad news in footage notes using a combination of nanotechnology and gibberish. Accountant: still too obvious. -Discount brokerage firms tell you that you're smart- Use you own ideas! Investors do their own research Buy it because I did. Thank you unbiased stranger! A secret society of Donald Trump look alike end up with all your money trumps: you're fired. you are!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 2004's comic on:


Tags #become irreplaceable, #escaped felon, #gain trust, #biggest cutsomers

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Wall: "I need to become irreplaceable so I can't be fired for my behavior." "I'll gain the trust of our biggest customer so they'll only deal with me." "I probably shouldn't say this, but everyone in my company except me is an escaped felon."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2005's comic on:


Tags #scathing letter, #coulmnist, #dongle, #vebal superiority, #feel alive, #dear nutbag

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Carol: I just fired off a scathing letter to a columnist for misusing the word "dongle". Im intoxicated with the feeling of verbal superiority. My sad life has meaning , I feel alive! The columnist: Dear Nutbag, Thanks for the input, Heres a link yo a dictionary, I await your apology

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 15, 2005's comic on:


Tags #fbi, #internet spam, #source, #fbi director, #dress up, #mammals, #creepy

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FBI. We have reason to believe that you're the source of all internet apam."I'm the director of the FBI. And you're both fired." "I'd heard that he likes to dress up as other mammals." "Creepy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 2005's comic on:


Tags #carol, #worst secretary, #fired, #involuntary termination form 904-b, #fill out form

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"Carol, you're the worst secretary ever. I have to let you go." "You can't fire me until you fill out the Involuntary Termination Form 904-B." "Can you get me one of those?" "Yeah. I'll get right on that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 2006's comic on:


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"We're off to see the Wizard of Landfill. He'll give you some ambition and he'll show me how to get home." "Can we go too? I need experience...And he needs a brain, heart, soul, and a strategic vision." "No I don't. You're fired!" "And a job...I need a job."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 15, 2006's comic on:


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"I gave Tom his two weeks' notice. You'll have to do his job until I replace him." "He's a bit disgruntled, but I'm sure he'll be a professional and train you before he leaves." "I was shocked and appalled to hear that you got fired." Grrr grrr "He isn't buying my fake sympathy." Grrr grrr "Sooo...How about a little training?" "Everything you need is in this irreplaceable binder." CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP "I probably won't get you a card."