Alice Sits Boss Comic Strips - Page 7
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1000 Results for Alice Sits Boss
View 61 - 70 results for alice sits boss comic strips. Discover the best "Alice Sits Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday April 25,
2021
Dilbert Interrupts Women
Tags #business, #discrimination, #office workers, #interrupt, #woman, #sense, #nincompoop, #babble, #pattern
Transcript
tina: dilbert is always interrupting me because i'm a woman. how do you deal with it when he interrupts you? alice: he doesn't interrupt me. tina: that makes no sense. he interrupts me because i'm a woman, and you're a woman...so... alice: maybe he doesn't interrupt me because i make sense when i talk. whereas you're more of a babbling nincompoop and a notorious ruiner of meetings. tina: well, i certainly don't know where you... alice: let's head back now. tina: you interrupted me! alice: try to spot the pattern.
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Wednesday April 21,
2021
Wally Takes A Sick Day
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #video call, #laptop, #sick day, #work, #unwell, #sick, #work from home, #coffee, #lazy
Transcript
boss and wally on video call. wally: i'm not feeling well, so i'm going to take the day off from work. boss: you work at home. and you'll be just as sick whether you work or not, so why not work? wally: i don't know if you know this about me, but i don't like working.
Tuesday April 20,
2021
Zooming Right
Tags #business, #sarcasm, #technology, #video call, #adjustments, #camera, #nose, #lighting, #lightbulb, #beard, #audio, #idea, #rude, #laptop
Transcript
alice: can you adjust your camera so i'm not looking up your nose? okay, now can you adjust your lighting so you don't look like a lightbulb with a beard? voice from laptop: how's my audio? alice: it's as good as your ideas.
Monday April 19,
2021
Boss Loves Dilbert
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #boss, #video call, #love, #wife, #camera, #relationship
Transcript
dilbert at home in recliner on video call with boss. voice from laptop: i love you. dilbert: you do? boss: no, not you. i was talking to my wife, who is off camera. no one loves you. dilbert: this was my longest relationship.
Saturday April 17,
2021
Too Technical For Boss
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #boss, #technical, #answer, #follow, #understand, #video call, #laptop, #5g, #signal, #jargon, #dumb
Transcript
dilbert and boss on video call. dilbert: my answer will be highly technical, so you might not be able to follow. boss: pfft! try me. dilbert: if the 5g node flurtifies the adjunct signal modulator, the entire neural honeycomb will transverpilate. boss: did i suddenly get dumber? dilbert: not suddenly, no.
Thursday April 15,
2021
Project Is Not Feasible
Tags #business, #technology, #video call, #project, #plan, #feasible, #back stab, #defend, #laptop, #cell phone, #competition
Transcript
boss and dilbert on video call. boss: i just talked to ted, and he says your project plan is not feasible. dilbert: i think you mean he mischaracterized my plan and then stabbed me in the back when i wasn't there to defend it. boss: he said you'd say that.
Tuesday April 13,
2021
Pretending To Listen
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #laptop, #pretending, #listening, #camera, #look, #zoom, #anger, #video call, #boss, #easy, #golden age
Transcript
boss on video call. boss: some of you are only pretending to be paying attention to this zoom call. boss yelling: you're still doing it! stop it! look into the camera!!! dilbert at home. dilbert: pretending to listen to your boss has never been easier. dogbert: golden age!
Monday April 12,
2021
Boss Needs To Be Dumber
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #boss, #smart, #dumb, #technical, #decision, #effective, #influence
Transcript
dilbert and dogbert at home. dilbert: i think i'd be more effective at work if my boss were either smarter, so he'd understand me... or dumber, so he'd know it's better to let me make all of the technical decisions. and i can't make him smarter, so my plan is to make him dumber. dogbert: it seems i've been a bad influence.
Sunday April 11,
2021
No Need To Zoom
Tags #managers & supervisors, #business, #technology, #video call, #voice call, #email, #texting, #zoom, #meeting, #update, #team, #laptop, #cell phone, #link, #progress
Transcript
boss: i'll schedule a zoom call with the whole team tomorrow to give the update. dilbert: or you could tell me tomorrow, and i'll tell the rest of the team on our noon zoom call. boss: um, okay. i'll send you a zoom link tomorrow. dilbert: does our call need to be a video call? can we do a voice call? boss: well, yes, i guess we could just do a voice call. dilbert: do we need to talk, or can you just send me an an email? boss: i suppose i could just send you an email. dilbert: okay. we're making progress. now, have you heard of "texting"?
Friday April 09,
2021
Zoom Team Building
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #team, #building, #session, #zoom, #drink, #heavy, #home, #absurd, #gift, #purchase, #laptop, #video call
Transcript
boss: on friday we'll be having a team building session on zoom. you are welcome to drink heavily because you will already be home. dilbert: i don't know how that could be more absurd. boss: and buy a gift for yourself.