Boost Sales Comic Strips - Page 7

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226 Results for Boost Sales

View 61 - 70 results for boost sales comic strips. Discover the best "Boost Sales" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business shake, etiquette & ethics, handshake, macaroni and cheese, moist and squishy

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Coworker: Hi, I'm Allen, from Sales. Dilbert: Dilbert. Your handshake feels like a wet sock full of macaroni and cheese. It makes me wish we never met. Coworker: Please let go of my hand. Dilbert: It's moist and squishy.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags average person, offer low prices, prices, products on sale, raising prices, smart enough

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CEO: We're going to stop pretending our products are always on sale and instead offer low prices all the time. The average person is smart enough to know that our so-called sales prices are our normal prices anyway. Dilbert: Have you ever talked to an average person? Boss: Tell me again why we're raising all of our prices?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sales personnel, cold calling, video chat, sales job, computer, selling on line, skype, technology

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Boss: You're supposed to be cold calling sales prospects. Wally: I am. I'm using a video chat site to randomly meet potential customers. This guy is excited to see me, and that's half of the sales job right here.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags retail business, sales drop, retail stores, self checkout, dumb customers, most shoplifted

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Finance Troll: Our sales have dropped to zero in retail stores that have self-checkout. Apparently the people who are dumb enough to want our product are too dumb to know how to use the self-checkout. On a positive note, we have the most shoplifted product of the year. Boss: Yes!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sales personnel, pretend, helpful, awkwardly upsell, listening, refrigerator, ice

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Dilbert is shopping. A salesman approaches him and says "Do you mind if I pretend to be helpful while I awkwardly try to upsell you?" Dilbert replies "Nope. Do you mind if I pretend to be listening while I think about other things?" "Cool," says the salesman. Dilbert thinks to himself "I'm glad I don't have your job." The salesman asks him "How old is your refrigerator? Do you like ice?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags gadgets, sales personnel, tablet computer, prototype, indestuctable, crash

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CEO: Our tablet computer is indestructible. Watch this... Man: Our company is next. Find the prototype. CEO: Oops. Was that yours?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, retail business, sales trip, dont talk, misleading impression, engineering support, after sale, bag of meat, lying bag of meat

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Boss: I need you to come with me on a sales trip, but don't talk to the customer. Your presence is needed to give a misleading impression of how much engineering support we plan to offer after the sale. Dilbert: So I'm nothing but a bag of meat? Boss: No. You're a lying bag of meat.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags big business, secondhand sales, tablet computer, business, design logo, pay another company, other companies, watch, engineers, degrade, low morale

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Boss: We're going into the tablet computer business. And by that I mean other companies will make the product and we'll design the logo. And by that I mean we'll pay another company to design the logo for us. Alice: Can we watch?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags commerce, service business, unmotivated sales guy, slides are blank, compelling reason, no commission work, budget issues

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Unmotivated sales guy Man: My slides are blank because no one told me what our product does. And I don't have a compelling reason to find out because I don't work on commission. If anyone asks why you didn't place an order, would you mind saying you have budget issues?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boredom, business ethics, boost morale, pretending to be intereted, overkill, unemployement, brain, fallout, yawn hole

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Boss: I'm here to boost your morale by pretending to be interested in you as a human being. But it's probably overkill since unemployment is around 9% and you're not likely to quit. Dilbert: Still, it's nice to... Boss: That's enough! I don't want my brain to fall out of my yawn hole.