Cancel Deal Comic Strips - Page 7
114 Results for Cancel Deal
View 61 - 70 results for cancel deal comic strips. Discover the best "Cancel Deal" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share October 03, 2005's comic on:
"I need five minutes on the pointy-haired boss' calendar." "No can do." "If I give you an appointment, I'll just have to cancel it later when something more important comes up." "What's he doing now?" "Combing his knuckles."
Share August 17, 2005's comic on:
Topper vs. a Customer "I competed in the Iditarod, an 1,150-mile dogsled race lasting 15 days, over the world's toughest terrain." "That's nothing. I completed the race while pretending to be one of your dogs." "Now I don't want to buy from your company." "That's nothing. Now I plan to burn my company to the ground!"
Share August 04, 2005's comic on:
Share June 18, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: "Our core values are service, intergrity, respect, teamwork, responsibility, trust, diversity, value, honesty, fun, passion, fairness and excellence." wally: "How should we deal with the inherent conflicts? I mean, what if I want to be irresponsible in a fun and passionate way?" The Boss: "You have to do all of them." "I notice that hygiene didn't make the list.
Share March 27, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: "Carol, the new manager hasn't hired an admin. so I said he could share you." Carol: "What?!!" "I'm drowning in work, and you want to double my load???!!!" The boss: "It's no big deal. Just prioritize your work." "And I need you to fax this." Carol: "No can do." "My top priority is getting the new guy all set up." The Boss: "Hmmm... I guess that's fair. I'll send him over." Carol: "I can't order your business cards, I need to do a huge faxing project!" "Hee hee! Marmaduke is sitting on something again!"
Share March 13, 2005's comic on:
"We need more staff for prject Cribou.' "No. You're thinking of project Caribbean." "Caribou is like project muskrat but with lower P.R.O.R.C." "P.R.O.R.C?" "Projected return on research capital." "Is muskrat the enterprise software project?" "Um... No... That would be project muskrat." "Cancel project musk ox, move the staff over to project zebra, delay panda and sdquirrel and give me a status report on probosics monkey." "We don't have any projects with those names." "How's that my fault?"
Share January 29, 2005's comic on:
Vendor: We'll build your software with all the features you want plus a few extras. Dilbert: "Or maybe you'll start late and claim there's no way to do everything by the deadline." "Then you'll say that the unfinished features aren't important and you're losing money on the deal." Vendor: "I can't hear you."
Share January 12, 2005's comic on:
Dilbert: Do you ever feel guilty for scamming innocent people out of their money? Dogbert: "No." "I only scam people who would do the same to me if they were just smarter." Dilbert: "So you use arrogance to cancel guilt?" Dogbert: "It's a good system."
Share December 03, 2004's comic on:
Wall: "I need to become irreplaceable so I can't be fired for my behavior." "I'll gain the trust of our biggest customer so they'll only deal with me." "I probably shouldn't say this, but everyone in my company except me is an escaped felon."
Share October 20, 2004's comic on:
Dogbert: welcome to dogcarts school for the socially oblivious. Today I'll pair with someone whose social defect will cancel out your own, woman: GAAA!! I keep trying to tap about my l=kids and you keep changing the topic to your self! Because Im fascinating.