Curiosity Killed Cat Comic Strips - Page 7

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137 Results for Curiosity Killed Cat

View 61 - 70 results for curiosity killed cat comic strips. Discover the best "Curiosity Killed Cat" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #delete incriminating email, #witness to crime, #no good plan

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I need you to delete all of our incriminating e-mails before the court sees them. "That plan is no good because I'd be a witness to the crime...unless you had me killed." "Phase Two is none of your concern." "It has a phase???"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #emailed file, #accomplishments, #entire month, #open the file, #down load, #browser, #upgrade broswer, #operating system, #upagrde, #software, #hard disk, #view of file, #engineering

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"My accomplishement this month was opening a file that someone e-mailed." "That took an entire month?" "It wasn't that easy. I didn't have the right software to open the file." "I tried to download the viewer from the Internet but the Web site didn't support my browser." "And I couldn't upgrade my browser until I updated my operating system!" "That required me to upgrade all of my software, too." "My hard disk got maxed out, so I had to upgrade my computer and transfer all of the files." "So, then you got to view the file?" "Yeah...It was a funny one about a cat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #watch my shows, #invite me over, #cable, #pulled, #bug in salad

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Dilmon: "While you're here, be a dear and run some CAT-5 to my walk-in closet so I can watch my shows when I'm in there." Dilbert: "I've notived that you only invite me over when you need a cable pulled." Dilmon: "I don't want to put a bug in your salad, but I will." Dilbert: "I'm glad we had this talk."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #marketing needs volunteers, #ads stimulate, #people brains, #cat scan, #see coming

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"Marketing needs volunteers for a study about how our ads stimulate people's brains." "Who among us would like to get a cat scan?" "Okay, seriously, who didn't see this coming?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat, #Wally, #black mail, #cat nip, #told truth, #came clean, #animals

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Alice: "Can you tell me who complained about my off-color e-mail joke? Catbert: "No, no, no." "All conversations with human resources are strictly confidential." "Wally, wally, wally, wally, wally, wally, wally..."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #revenue, #people killed by product, #health risks, #kills people

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The Boss: "Our revenue is now double the number of people that our product has killed recently." Asok: "Our product costs $80. Are you saying that each one kills 40 people?" The Boss: "Our customers know the health risks, so technically they're killing themselves." Group: "So technically we aren't scum?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #non credible guy, #invented reality tv, #preposterous stories, #picture hostility & curiosity, #einstein, #entertain realtives, #new theory, #liar, #pathological liar, #lies

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The non-credible guy "And that's how I invented 'reality tv.'" "Why don't you keep telling me preposterous stories while I stare at you with a mixture of hostility and curiosity?" "And then Einstein asked me to entertain his relatives while he thought of a name for his new theory." "Good, good."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #poorly designed product, #ever been killed, #tainted research

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"This is the Dogbert research company. Have you ever been killed by a poorly designed product?" "My tainted research shows that your products haven't killed anyone." "For an extra $50,000, I can call a second person." "I don't want to jinx it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat show, #clothing, #date, #good listener, #mindless replica, #uninteresting stories

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A female coworker asks Dilbert, "Would it be okay if I asked your mindless replica for a date?" The coworker continues, "I'm full of uninteresting stories and I need a guy who's a good listener." The coworker and the Visibuddy are at dinner. The coworker says, "Now I'll describe the clothing of each person at the cat show." The Visibuddy hits himself in the head with a fork, "Thunk!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #set up meeting, #customer, #technology, #humiliating, #poor, #fgreat food

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The Boss and Dilbert are still in barrels. The Boss says, "Set up a meeting with the customer so we can demonstrate our technology." Dilbert responds, "It's humiliating because we're so poor now. What will I feed them?" Dilbert pours cat food into bowls for the customers. He says, "If you think the food is great, wait until you see our technology!"