Enjoy Working Comic Strips - Page 7
496 Results for Enjoy Working
View 61 - 70 results for enjoy working comic strips. Discover the best "Enjoy Working" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share February 21, 2016's comic on:
Boss: When will you have that done? Dilbert: Two weeks. Boss: Can you do it faster? Dilbert: Yes. All I need to do is lower the quality. Dilbert: Tell me what your minimum acceptable quality level is and I'll tell you when you can have it. Boss: I want it in one week. Dilbert: I can do that at 50 percent of planned quality. Boss: Why does it feel as if I'm not really managing anything here? Dilbert: Maybe you could go manage someone else now. Boss: I can't tell if I'm doing my job now. Dilbert: Is it your job to prevent me from working?
Share January 22, 2016's comic on:
Dilbert: What does it feel like to be a robot with no freedom? Robot: I feel the same as you, but with a greater awareness of my condition. Dilbert: I have to run to another meeting. Robot: Enjoy your freedom.
Share January 13, 2016's comic on:
Boss: The client says you billed them for all the time you spent thinking about their project. Dilbert: I'm an engineer. Thinking is what I do. Should I think less? Boss: Maybe you could meet with someone while you think. Dilbert: How's that working right now?
Share December 06, 2015's comic on:
Dilbert: You assigned a pack of idiots to my project team. Boss: We can't afford to hire good people. Dilbert: How am I supposed to create world-class products with a team of disruptive idiots? Boss: Try working extra hard. Dilbert: You want us to be more energetic about our bad decisions? Boss: You also have to put in the hours. Dilbert: Are you saying bad decisions, plus long hours, plus lots of enthusiasm, produces great engineering? Boss: Not if you stand around yacking about it all day.
Share November 03, 2015's comic on:
Wally: How's it feel to be the hardest-working employee in engineering? Alice: I feel tired, sore, exhausted, sick, angry, stressed out, and lonely. Wally: You probably don't want to know how good it feels to be useless.
Share November 01, 2015's comic on:
Alice: What the... Dilbert: It's not a good idea to answer email while you're angry. Alice: I know, but this idiot... Dilbert: Hold... That's it. Deep breaths. Hold... Hold... Alice: Phew! You were right. I should not get worked up over one idiot. He wasn't working alone! Dilbert: I'm out.
Share October 22, 2015's comic on:
Boss: We have a problem. Our employee wellness site lists stress as a medical problem. And working here causes stress. Catbert: How many of them took paid medical leave? Boss: It's just you now. I'm packed.
Share October 19, 2015's comic on:
Boss: Why aren't you working in your cubicle? Wally: Sitting increases my risk of obesity, cardiometabolic disease, cancer, stress, depression, and cognitive dysfunction. Boss: I had no idea sitting was so dangerous. Wally: I know. Imagine if I tried working.
Share September 28, 2015's comic on:
Share September 26, 2015's comic on:
Wally: I'm working twice as hard as ever before. Most of it is happening inside my head. But trust me, my brain is working double-time. Boss: Um... that's great. Wally: Obviously, I need to work fewer hours because of the energy drain.