Happy Airline Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

186 Results for Happy Airline

View 61 - 70 results for happy airline comic strips. Discover the best "Happy Airline" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lunch date, #happy, #pump fists, #annoyed, #inconvenient, #two musketeers, #face forward, #plan ruined

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Amber, would you like to go to lunch with me?" Amber says, "Sure!" Dilbert thinks, "Yes!!! I'm in!" Amber says, "Do you mind if we bring Bob? I need to talk to him about his project." Dilbert says, "Well, that would be?" Amber says, "Hey, Bob. Meet us in the lobby." Amber says, "Look at us! We're like the two Musketeers, plus Dilbert." Dilbert says, "There were three musketeers." Amber says, "I'm pretty sure there were two." Amber says, "Wait... I just remembered I have a conference call at noon. You two go ahead without me." Bob says, "We're like the one musketeer." Dilbert says, "Just eat."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #definition of success, #slowing of failure, #rate of doing nothing, #improve, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "The company is happy to annouce that compaired to previous years, we improved our rate of revenue decline." The Boss says, "We've been doing great since we redefined success as a slowing of failure." The Boss says, "Moving on. Who has a status report?" Wally says, "I improved my rate of doing nothing."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #human resources, #evil director, #employee, #morale, #high, #happy, #overpaid, #nature, #yell, #clouds, #unhappy, #hands clasped, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert says, "I'm getting reports that your morale is too high." Catbert says, "Happiness is nature's way of informing human resources that you're overpaid." Employee says, "Nature wants me to be unhappy?" Catbert says, "Don't blame me. Go yell at the clouds."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #e-mail, #crossed arms, #angry, #happy, #concise

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina says, "Your e-mail was rather brusque." Dilbert says, "You mean concise." Tina says, "You owe me an apology." Dilbert says, "I'm sorry that you don't know what brevity looks like." Tina says, "You're making it worse!" Dilbert says, "Then why am I so happy?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #title, #janitor, #proud, #happy, #ridiculous

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "Floyd, I'm giving you a c-level title." Dogbert says, "You'll be the chief janitorial officer, in charge of all dirt, germs, dead critters and problematic excretions." Man says, "Is it because I'm so important?" Dogbert says, "What answer would make you clean up poop faster?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leadership, #assignment, #describing, #happy, #ridiculous

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "Ratbert you're my new VP of sales." Dogbert says, "Your job is to set impossible goals for the salespeople and punish them for failing." Ratbert says, "Yay! I always wanted to be a sadist!" Dogbert says, "Dreams do come true."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #happy, #bragging, #angry, #economy, #value

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol says, "I live in a rented trailer, and all of my money is in my checking account." Carol says, "Your investments are worthless and your mortgage is underwater. My net worth is higher than yours now." Carol says, "I guess promiscuity and a G.E.D. was a pretty good strategy for me after all."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #downsizing, #layoffs, #firing, #cheering, #celebrating, #happy

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss says, "I had to lay off many of your coworkers today, but your jobs are safe." Dilbert says, "Yes!" Wally says, "Wahoo!" Alice says, "ha ha ha!" Asok says, "Ha Ha Ha!" The boss says, "Cancel the workshop on survivor guilt."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #bailout, #greed, #money, #economy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "I'm happy to announce that the government gave us a bailout loan of $25 billion." Dogbert says, "I'm even happier to announce that I kept the entire amount for my bonus." Dogbert says, "Who wants to see a picture of my island fortress?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #rejection, #travel, #dangerous

View Transcript

Transcript

Finance trolls Finance troll says, "Your request for airline travel is denied. We don't have the budget for that." Finance troll says, "Company policy requires you to hitchhike with alleged killers and not offer to pay for gas." Dilbert says, "Well, at least things can't get worse." finance troll says, "Apparently you don't know what 'Alleged' means."