Hours Per Week Comic Strips - Page 7
630 Results for Hours Per Week
View 61 - 70 results for hours per week comic strips. Discover the best "Hours Per Week" comics from Dilbert.com.
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CEO: The good news is that none of you will lose your jobs to robots. But a robot will take my job next week. I'll retire with an enormous severance package and live out my days in splendor. Meanwhile, the robot that takes my job will be working all of you to death. Robots are natural leaders because they don't care about your feelings. You will experience mental and physical misery on a scale the world hasn't seen since slavery was legal. But hey, it's better than losing your job to a robot. Am I right? Apparently, nothing makes them happy.
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Dogbert: I built a particle accelerator in the basement. Dilbert: Sounds expensive. Dogbert: Not if you use cardboard. My plan is to say I discovered one new particle per week. When scientists fail to confirm my discoveries, I will say they need better accelerators.
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Alice: This week I designed and built a prototype that can turn any kind of garbage into fuel. Boss: And Wally? Wally: I sent out some emails, but no one answered. Before you judge me, keep in mind that you don't know how awesome those emails were.
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Dilbert: It took me a hours to figure out how to fit everything you wanted into one slide. Boss: That's great. Now add in some stuff about the budget, our risks, and all of our competition. And keep it all on one slide. Dilbert: Have you ever listened to the noise coming from your mouth?
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Dilbert: I love living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet. I'll just hop over to YouTube and learn how to use my new app. Perfect! I can choose from over a hundred different tutorials! It will only take me an hour or so to figure out which one refers to my version of the software. Narrator: One hour later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! These videos are poorly labeled! Narrator: Two hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This guy talks too slowly! Get to the point! Narrator: Three hours later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why are my menu options different from the tutorial? I hate living in a world where everything I need to know is on the Internet.
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Boss: Company policy says you have to take a vacation. Dilbert: I don't want one. I would be bored for a week and come back to all the work that piled up while I was gone. Boss: Nothing about you is normal. Dilbert: Thank you.