How To Comic Strips - Page 7
Search Filters
Year
- 2023
- 2022
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
1000 Results for How To
View 61 - 70 results for how-to comic strips. Discover the best "How To" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday August 16,
2020
Humans Making Decisions
Tags biases, business, data, decision, guessing, human nature, making, primitive, psychology, reason, sarcasm, superstitions, technology, science
Transcript
dilbert: when humans were primitive and dumb, they used their superstitions and biases to make decisions. eventually, science won out, and we evolved to use data and reason to make decisions. dogbert: how'd that work out? dilbert: not so good. it turns out that all of our data are unreliable and conflicting. and we don't have the mental capacity to use reason. dogbert: it's still better than guessing. dilbert: how do you know that? dogbert: you are hard to talk to.
Thursday August 13,
2020
Edits Without Tracking
Tags accident, business, complex, delete, document, edit, email, face mask, forgot, technology, tracker
Transcript
co-worker: i edited your incredibly complex document and sent it to you by email. dilbert: i don't see your high-lighted changes. co-worker: i forgot to turn on the edit tracker. dilbert: i'm going to accidentally delete your email. co-worker: that's probably how i'd play it too.
Monday August 10,
2020
Meeting Ending Invention
Tags managers & supervisors, invent, app, application, ring, phone, meeting, strategic, direction, face mask
Transcript
dilbert: i invented an app that makes your phone ring to get you out of meetings. boss: how does that fit our strategic direction? dilbert's phone: bing, bing, bing! dilbert walking away: i need to take this call.
Friday August 07,
2020
Boss Doesn't Understand
Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, server, migration, difficult, understand, question, face maks
Transcript
boss: can you finish the server migration by monday? dilbert: no way. boss: how hard can it be? dilbert: you only say that about things you don't understand. boss: i ask that question every day. dilberty: yup.
Thursday August 06,
2020
Offer 90 Percent Less
Tags managers & supervisors, sarcasm, price, list, stupid, impact, face mask, business
Transcript
boss: try offering 90% less than the list price and see if they take it. dilbert: no one reduces their prices by 90% just because you want them to do it. i will look stupid for asking! boss: watch how that doesn't impact me at all.
Tuesday August 04,
2020
Dilbert Can Answer Questons
Tags answer, business, delegate, face mask, managers & supervisors, meeting, project, question, sarcasm, awkward
Transcript
boss: dilbert can answer any of your questions, but i have another meeting. dilbert: not really. i have no involvement in the project. he just told me to follow him to this room. co-worker: well, this is awkward. dilbert: how about i go to the restroom and never come back?
Sunday August 02,
2020
Dilbert Tells The Odds
Tags business, decision, estimate, managers & supervisors, miscommunication, odds, technology, wrong
Transcript
dilbert: i estimate odds at a 70% chance things go well, and a 30% chance we lose money on the deal. boss: if we lose money, will you admit you were wrong? dilbert: how could i be wrong? i'm just telling you the odds. boss: if we lose money, that's on you for recommending it. dilbert: um...no. i'm telling you the odds and letting you decide. boss: but you're the one saying this is such a great deal. dilbert upsetting and yelling forcing face mask off his face: i'm only telling you the odds, you pea-brained ignoramus!!! boss: so, you won't admit you were wrong? dilbert's face mask is over his eyes.
Wednesday July 29,
2020
Bad Judge Of Character
Tags business, managers & supervisors, bad, judge, character, hire, termite, clothes, disguise, youtube, makeup, video
Transcript
boss wearing face mask: i'm starting to think i'm a bad judge of character. the last three people i hired turned out to be termite colonies in clothes. dilbert in face mask: how did they disguise the face part? boss: they learned from youtube makeup videos.
Thursday July 23,
2020
Empathy Sensor
Tags business, empathy, feelings, office workers, psychology, sad, sensor, story, face mask
Transcript
tina wearing face mask: you did not have sufficient empathy when i told you my sad story. dilbert wearing face mask: how could you possible measure my internal feelings of empathy? tina: i used my empathy sensor. dilbert: that's a stapler.
Sunday July 19,
2020
People Believe Anything
Tags argument, business, people, believe, anything, whisper, campaign, rival, management, dumb, covid, pandemic
Transcript
all parties wearing face masks. boss: i'm starting a whisper campaign against my rival in management. i want you to tell people he buys babies from the poor and eats them. dilbert: no one is dumb enough to believe that. boss: people will believe anything. dilbert: not anything. boss: yes, anything. dilbert: fine. i'll try it, but only to prove how wrong you are. office worker: how many does he eat per day? dilbert thinking: i need a new planet.

