Listening To Little People Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Listening To Little People

View 61 - 70 results for listening to little people comic strips. Discover the best "Listening To Little People" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #business ethics, #construction, #inventions, #nature, #technology, #trees

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I invented a cost-effective product to harvest CO2 from the air and turn it into construction material. Asok: So...you invented a tree? Dilbert: What? Asok: Trees take CO2 from the air and turn it into wood. Your invention will compete with plants and trees for necessary CO2. It seems you have doomed all life on Earth. Dilbert: Not if people act rationally and stop removing the CO2 when...wait... You're right. I doomed the planet. Boss: I'll be dead by then, so ship it.

Documents On Chairs

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Documents On Chairs  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #frustrated, #office, #office workers, #paper

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I hate it when people leave documents on my chair! I will have my revenge by sticking this at the bottom of my biggest pile. Winning.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 20, 2019's comic on:


Tags #annoyance, #insults, #office, #office workers, #people, #sarcasm, #introvert, #coworkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Sometimes it seems as if you don't like me. Dilbert: Don't be ridiculous. I'm just an introvert. Being around people drains my energy. I only avoid you because spending five minutes with you feels like being buried alive. With fleas instead of dirt. Tina: So...it isn't personal? Dilbert: I need a nap.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 13, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boredom, #panic, #technology, #smartphone, #thoughts

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm turning off my digital devices so I can spend some time with my thoughts. Dogbert: That sounds like a terrible idea. Do you remember what your quiet thoughts were like? Dilbert: Not really. But how bad could it be? This isn't so bad. Just a bit boring. Five minutes later. Dilbert: I'm getting the shakes. The boredom has metastasized. Gaaaa!!! The boredom is overwhelming! Kill me! Kill me! Dogbert: Maybe you should have tried being with people. Dilbert: It was already bad enough.

Firing Ted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Firing Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #panic, #suspicious

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, come to my office at five o'clock. Ted: Gaaa!!! That's what you say when you plan to fire people! Boss: Don't be ridiculous. Also, bring your keys.

Boxes With Names

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boxes With Names - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #meetings, #office workers, #suspicious, #layoff

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The rumors of a major layoff are completely untrue. Dilbert: Why did the facilities management people just deliver a huge load of cardboard boxes to the break room? Boss: You can never have too many boxes. Dilbert: Why does every box have an employee name on it?

Working With Old Ned

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Working With Old Ned - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 2018's comic on:


Tags #elderly, #men and women, #office workers, #old

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to work with old Ned on this project. He's a little bit old-fashioned, but don't let that get to you. He retires in six months. Alice: I've been asked to work with you. Ned: Women have jobs now? ? ?

Boss Has A Vision For The Company

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Has A Vision For The Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 26, 2018's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #obliviousness, #office workers, #sarcasm, #listen

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: And that's my vision for the company. Dilbert: All you did was list the projects we are already working on while making it sound like astrology. Boss: In my defense, I didn't think any of you were listening.

Keeping The Worthless People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Keeping The Worthless People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 07, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #salary, #incompetence

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I've noticed that 20% of my employees do 80% of the work around here. But I need to keep all of the worthless employees because my pay is based on how many people report to me. Catbert: Doesn't their incompetence bother you? Boss: Not since I found a way to get paid for it.

Jargon

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 2018's comic on:


Tags #confusion, #employees, #irritation, #language, #meetings, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: This was a great meeting. Are there any questions? Dilbert: I didn't understand any of the jargon you used for the past hour, so I have no idea what this meeting was about. Man: Why didn't you say something sooner? Dilbert: That's a good strategy for people who have hope.