Mean Comic Strips - Page 7
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333 Results for Mean
View 61 - 70 results for mean comic strips. Discover the best "Mean" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday April 06,
2016
Ted Has A Ravine Option
Tags cruelty, empathy, hr, human resources, mean, guest artist, brenna thummler, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director Of Human Resources. Ted: Dilbert said he wants me to drive into a ravine. Catbert: I want that too. I didn't realize it was an option. Ted: Perhaps I have come tot he wrong place. Catbert: I hear good things about the ravine.
Sunday March 06,
2016
Tags insult, offense, engineer, programmer, coding, anger, technology, engineering
Transcript
Man: How's the software coming? Alice: Still waiting for you to give me the specs so I can start. Man: I already told you it's a cloud app that does data. Hey, I can't do your job for you. You have to meet me halfway. Aren't you supposed to be "agile?" I mean, how hard is it to rearrange zeroes and ones all day? Should I ask again tomorrow? Alice: Sure, if you're alive.
Saturday November 21,
2015
Asok Meets Dick
Tags mean, jerk, internet, comment, sarcasm, forum, social media, technology
Transcript
Asok: Someone told me you're the guy who makes all the jerky comments on the Internet. Dick: Oh, really? Someone "told you?" Wow. Have you heard of a thing called science? Asok: It's you! Dick: I'll bet you use a dumb avatar, too.
Thursday August 06,
2015
Teeth Brushing Accident
Tags insult, criticism, presentation, stupid, mean
Transcript
Coworker: Are there any questions about my presentation? Alice: Yes. Did you brush your teeth too aggressively and accidentally stab yourself in the brain? Coworker: Can you be more specific? Alice: Frontal lobes?
Wednesday May 13,
2015
Agree With Idiots To Gain Trust
Tags condescention, condescending, agreement, mocking, insult, insulting
Transcript
Boss: Stop agreeing with me in ways that sound like you don't mean it. Dilbert: Experts say one should first agree with idiots to gain trust before trying to change their minds. Boss: You need to stop doing that. Dilbert: You are so right about that.
Thursday April 02,
2015
Wally Wins A Nobel For Economics
Tags pedantic, internet, troll, correction, nobel prize, economy, economist, technology
Transcript
Wally The Economist. Dilbert: I wonder if you'll win the Nobel Prize for Economics. Man: There is no "Nobel Prize for Economics," you idiot! You mean The Sveriges Riksbank Prize In Memory of Alfred Nobel. Dilbert; Do we know you? Man: I'm Dick, from the Internet. Everyone knows me.
Wednesday April 01,
2015
World's Greatest Economist
Tags coincidence, deception, economist, economy, money, random jargon, art, science
Transcript
Dilbert: You are being hailed as the best economist of our age because your random jargon turned out to mean something. Wally: That's nice, but as a professional economist, I only care if there is a cash award. Dilbert: The world's greatest economist should already be rich. Wally: It's more art than science.
Friday February 06,
2015
Emotionally Manipulative Robot Warranty
Tags manipulation, manipulative, manipulative behavior, robot, upsell, warranty
Transcript
The Emotionally Manipulative Robot. Robot: It isn't too late to buy an extended warranty for me. I mean, wow! Think about the enormous expense of fixing me if something unexpected happens. If you need me, I'll be on a wobbly ladder, changing light bulbs near the pool
Wednesday January 14,
2015
Get Off Wally's Back!
Tuesday December 30,
2014
Dilbert Reduces Decisions
Tags attractive, clothes, clothing, dating, deciding, decisions, eliminates decisons, fine tuning, system, tube clothes, relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: I only wear tube clothes now because it reduces my number of daily decisions. Tina: You mean decisions such as... where to go on a date? Because I don't see that coming up. Dilbert: I'm still fine-tuning the system.


