Sales Support Engineer Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

578 Results for Sales Support Engineer

View 61 - 70 results for sales support engineer comic strips. Discover the best "Sales Support Engineer" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job, #scope, #negotiating, #engineer, #demands, #failure, #stress, #business, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We need to cut our budget. Go to all of our vendors and tell them to reduce their prices. Dilbert: Why would they do that for us? Boss: Tell them we'll buy from someone else unless they do. Dilbert: That's what we told them to get the prices we have now. I'm an engineer, not a professional negotiator. Your plan has failure designed into it. Your poor leadership already has me on the edge of madness. This could push me over the edge. Boss: And I need it done by Tuesday.

Programming Environment

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Programming Environment - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #productivity, #programmer, #engineer, #developer, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you finish writing the software? Dilbert: No. I spent the last three days setting up my programming environment. Boss: So... you've done... nothing? Dilbert: Nothing you'd understand.

Volunteers For Mars Trip

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Volunteers For Mars Trip - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #space, #astronaut, #engineering, #karma, #death, #design, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need volunteers to go to Mars in the spaceship we're building. Dilbert: Ask Ted. He's dispensable because he's a terrible engineer. Boss: Ted designed the spaceship. Dilbert: Karma will sort that all out.

Car Rental Typing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Car Rental Typing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #logic, #efficiency, #car rental, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Car Rental. Man: I hope you don't have some sort of technology job. Dilbert: Why? Man: Because the user experience you are about to endure might make your head explode. Narrator: Twenty minutes later. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! Why do you need to type so much?!!! Man: We got an engineer!

Alice Gives Approval

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Gives Approval - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deal, #support, #negotiations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Our pointy-haired boss asked me to get everyone's buy-in on this. Alice: I'll agree to your stupid idea if you support my great idea later. Dilbert: Deal. Alice: Should I read it? Dilbert: I don't see why.

Sales Is Blaming Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Sales Is Blaming Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sales, #responsibility, #blame, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our salespeople are blaming Marketing for the low demand. Marketing is blaming Engineering for making a product no one wants. So I blamed our customers for misleading us about their needs. Asok: Now I don't feel so bad about our price-gouging.

Blame Rolls Downhill

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Blame Rolls Downhill - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blame, #responsibility, #management

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our CEO blamed the Sales department for our low revenue. Sales blamed Marketing and Marketing blamed Engineering. Guess why I'm here. Dilbert: To shield me from unfair accusations?

Tina Isn't An Engineer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Tina Isn't An Engineer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineer, #evaluation, #value, #catch-22, #fired, #termination, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The company makes me rank all of my employees. I put you last because you're not an engineer. I have to fire whoever is ranked lowest, and I can't afford to lose any engineers. Tina; What if I work harder, and do a great job? Boss: Then I'd fire you for not being a team player.

Weak Sales Reorg

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Weak Sales Reorg - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executives, #money, #golden parachute, #greed, #logic, #sales, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our executive team didn't know what to do about weak sales. SO they reorganized the company and gave themselves new titles and big raises. They still don't know what to do about weak sales, but they report being happier about the situation.

Boss Buys Software Without Help

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Buys Software Without Help - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad advice, #Advice, #sales, #lying, #deception, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I bought new software for our network. Dilbert: Who helped you on the technical side? Boss: The vendor. He said our current software uses the wrong kind of electricity.