Sales Training Comic Strips - Page 7

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339 Results for Sales Training

View 61 - 70 results for sales training comic strips. Discover the best "Sales Training" comics from Dilbert.com.

Twitter The Video Game

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Twitter The Video Game - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #twitter, #social media, #game, #ignorance, #trick, #prank, #technology

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Dilbert: Our sales dropped to zero after you offended customers on Twitter. Did someone tell you Twitter was a video game? Narrator: One week ago. Boss: And how would I kill these trolls? Wally: With your words.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #time, #freedom, #free will, #schedule, #work load, #stress, #free time, #breaks, #lunch

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Boss: Schedule your training during your lunch hours so it doesn't impact your projects. Dilbert: But... my lunch hour is the only freedom I experience in a typical day. The rest of my time is either scheduled to the minute or driven by whatever crisis is happening. Please don't take my lunch hour and reduce me to nothing but a prisoner in a digital chain gang. I'm barely clinging to my illusion of free will as it is. This could push me over the edge. If you take away my one hour of freedom in the day, I might as well be a robot. Boss: Relax. This is temporary. Dilbert: For how long? Boss: Until I can replace you with a robot.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #communication, #managers, #training, #obstacle, #laziness

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Dilbert: Can I take a class to improve my communication skills? Boss: What are you talking about? Dilbert: I want to take a class that teaches me how to communicate better. Boss: I don't understand what you're asking me. Dilbert: I am asking permission to take a class to help me communicate better. Boss: I see your lips moving but I can't figure out what you're asking. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! There's no way to get there from here! Boss: I'm glad I took that management class on how to not listen. It already paid off.

Dogbert's Negotiating Class

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Dogbert's Negotiating Class - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #book, #deal, #negotiating, #negotiation, #self help, #guest artist, #josh shipley

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Dogbert: Welcome to Dogbert's one-week training class for negotiators. I believe in leading by example, so this entire course will involve me trying to persuade you to buy my book. If everyone in the class buys my book, you can all have the rest of the week off. Voice: Done.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sales personnel, #salesman, #sales, #honesty, #deception, #stragegy, #sociopath, #lying, #lie, #business

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Man: I need you to join me on a sales call to tell my customer how easy it will be to switch to our software. Dilbert: It isn't easy. Man: This is a sales call. All you need to do is say everything will be easy. Dilbert: What happens when they find out it isn't easy? Man: They won't find out until after they pay us. Dilbert: What will you do when they complain? Man: I'll tell your boss you misled them. Dilbert: Not if I warn him first! Man: Too late. I already told him you're a liar.

Dilbert Times His Nods

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Dilbert Times His Nods - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #honesty, #candor, #lying, #deception, #sales, #sales personnel, #ethics, #business

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Client: Why does your engineer keep nodding? Dilbert: I don't like to lie, so I just nod while he times his lies to my nods. You were totally right about them hating candor.

Nod At Preset Intervals

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Nod At Preset Intervals - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lying, #lie, #collusion, #nonverbal communication, #honest, #sales, #sales personnel, #ethics, #business

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Boss: You don't have to lie to customers, but at least nod your head when our salesperson lies. Dilbert: Can I not at preset intervals and let the salesperson time the lies to my nods? Salesman: I can work with that.

I Would Never Ask You To Lie

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I Would Never Ask You To Lie - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sales personnel, #lying, #sales, #ethics, #business

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Boss: Stop being honest when you go on sales calls. Dilbert: You want me to lie? Boss: I would never ask you to lie. I'm asking you to nod your head and smile while our salesperson lies.

Dilbert Can Tweak The Software

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Dilbert Can Tweak The Software - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #sales, #sales personnel, #demands, #rules, #promise, #restrictions, #obliviousness, #business

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The Sales Call. Salesman: If you need any tweaks to the software, Dilbert can do that in minutes. Dilbert: I'm not allowed to tweak the software for one customer. Salesman: He'll do it anyway. Dilbert: I'm going to report you.

The Generic Graph

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The Generic Graph - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #cost, #saving, #chart, #graph, #penny pinching, #thrift, #frugality

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Boss: The sales estimate looks like this. Alice: That looks like a chart you showed us yesterday about our travel budget. Boss: The company is standardizing on this one chart.