Ted Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

448 Results for Ted

View 61 - 70 results for ted comic strips. Discover the best "Ted" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags confused, irritation, misunderstanding, office, office workers, requests

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did you finish the specs I asked you for last week? Ted: You didn't follow up with me on that, so I assumed you didn't need them. Dilbert: I didn't need to follow up. I asked for the specs by today, and you said you would have them done. Ted: Yes, but then you didn't ask me again. Dilbert: There was no reason to ask you again. Ted: Obviously there was a reason because asking me once didn't work. Dilbert: Can you finish it by next week? Ted: Yes. Dilbert: Good. Ted: As long as you follow up.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags communication, frustrated, office, office workers, talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Did Alice talk to you about the cost estimates? Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I can't hear you. Ted: Mumble mumble!!! Dilbert: Now you're just mumbling louder. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: Maybe you could turn toward me when you mumble and I can try to read your lips. Ted: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: I'm getting something about grapes, windshields, asthma, and blockchain. Ted: I didn't say any of those things. Dilbert: Okay. I understood that sentence. Now answer my question the same way. Ted: Mumble mumble.

Bitter Losers

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bitter Losers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, idea, lying, managers & supervisors, office workers, Promotion

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm promoting Ted for coming up with a genius idea to reduce our software expenses. Dilbert: That was actually my idea. All Ted did was tell you it was his idea. Boss: How do you put up with these bitter losers? Ted: The promotion helps.

Complaining About Ted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Complaining About Ted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags complaining, computer software, engineering, office, office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I took over Ted's software project. Everything he did was inefficient and stupid. Okay, we're done here. I'm checking you off my list. Alice: How many people are you complaining to? Dilbert: I trimmed the list to three hundred.

Idiots Don't Know They Are Idiots

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Idiots Don't Know They Are Idiots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags the boss, alice, ted talk, idiots, dumb, career, change, smart, possible, speak

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I watched a Ted talk yesterday about how idiots don't know they are dumb. Alice: For the sake of my career, I hope you change the subject as soon as possible. The Boss: Did you know idiots believe they are smart? Alice: Must... Not... Speak...

When Will Ted By Done

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
When Will Ted By Done - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, the boss, test, data, ted, working, done, range

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: When will I get the test data? Dilbert: I don't know Ted is working on that. The Boss: When do you think he will be done? Dilbert: I know. I'm not Ted. The Boss: Just give me a range. Dilbert: Between one day and seven-hundred years.

Spending The Company's Money

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Spending The Company's Money - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, price, high, ted, company, money, live, die, minute, sense

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: This price is too high. Ted: Why do you care? You're spending the company's money, not your own. And the company doesn't care if you live or die. Dilbert: Give me a minutes to think of why that doesn't make sense. Ted: Take as long as you need.

Ted The Liar

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted The Liar - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags alice, the boss, ted, liar, policy, forbid, disrespecting, co-workers, lying

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Ted says you called him a liar. Our policy forbids disrespecting your co-workers. Alice: But Ted's lying is okay? The Boss: We don't have a policy about lying. Alice: Did Ted tell you that? The Boss: Yes. Oh...

No Policy Against Lying

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Policy Against Lying - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Catbert, ted, evil, director, human, resources, lying, policy, checked

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil director of human resources. Ted: Alice called me a liar. Catbert: What were you doing when that happened? Ted: Lying. Catbert: Maybe we should talk about that. Ted: There's no company policy against lying I checked.

Ted Dies From Chair

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Dies From Chair - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Catbert, the boss, ted, treadmill, alice, exercise ball, kneeling chair, ergonomics

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Ted got thrown from his treadmill desk, bounced off of alice's exercise ball chair, and broke his neck on a kneeling chair. The cause of death is listed as, "good ergonomics." On the plus side, his posture was excellent.