What Looked Like Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for What Looked Like

View 61 - 70 results for what looked like comic strips. Discover the best "What Looked Like" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Recommends Blockchain

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Recommends Blockchain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #business, #computer software, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: I don't understand why you are recommending blockchain for this application. Boss: My staff are the experts, but I can explain the basic idea. You see, using blockchain is like losing a necklace on the beach. Then a seagull finds the necklace and takes it back to it's nest. And we all like data security, don't we? CEO: It's almost as if you are proposing a plan you don't understand at any level. Boss: Well, yes, but keep in mind that you wouldn't understand it even if I could explain it. CEO: But you're sure someone on your staff understands it, right? Boss: Define "sure".

New Tv Ad

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
New Tv Ad - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #argument, #business ethics, #marketing, #men and women, #office workers, #relations between the sexes, #accuse

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ben, from marketing, is here to give us a preview of our new tv ad. Ben: The opening scene shows a bunch of men who are weak and stupid, failing to solve a common problem. Then a confident and strong woman enters and solves the problem with ease. Dilbert: Isn't that incredibly sexist? Ben: No, because only the men are weak and stupid. Dilbert: And that's not sexist? Ben: Why are you being so weak and stupid? You sound like a bigot. Dilbert: I'll be quiet now. Wally: As quickly as it began, the rebellion was quashed.

Dilbert Gets His Head Fixed

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Gets His Head Fixed  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #confused, #employees, #frustration, #garbage, #help, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Garbage Man: Looks like you've been beating your head against a wall in frustration. Stick your head in this garbage can to fix it. Dilbert: Why is this working? Garbage Man: Why wouldn't it?

Best Employees

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Best Employees  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #big business, #confused, #employees, #customer service

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We have the best employees in the industry! Dilbert: Then why are we ranked last in customer satisfaction? CEO: I blame our customers. Wally: Why can't they be awesome like us?

.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
. - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #criticism, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #sabotage

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: My new employee is doing such great work that he makes the rest of you look like chimpanzees. I think you know what you need to do. Wally: Sabotage all of his projects. Boss: Try to do it before he takes my job.

Unconscious Bias

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Unconscious Bias - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #obliviousness, #office workers, #racism, #training, #bias

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: You haven't completed the mandatory training on unconscious bias. Dilbert: I'm not biased. Carol: Maybe you are when you are not conscious. Dilbert: I'm a bigot in my sleep? Carol: And you look like a drooler.

Wally Writes Fiction

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Writes Fiction - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #business, #managers & supervisors

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: i decided to try my hand at writing fiction. i like writing fiction because it doesn't require any research. i can literally make up a story out of nothing. i feel sorry for nonfiction writers. they have to get the facts right. but a fiction writer only has to use imagination. i can make any wild assumptions about the future that i want. boss: i asked you here to talk about your budget forecast. wally: that's what i was talking about.

Wally Is New Pet Employee

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Is New Pet Employee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #business ethics, #criticism, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I"m looking for a new pet employee. The ideal candidate would be a brown-nosing tattler with no ethical core. Wally: That sounds like a brilliant idea, even though Dilbert says you are a moron. Boss: You got the job.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #apple, #criticism, #employees, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #steve jobs, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I've decided to be more like Steve Jobs. I want all of you to work day and night or else I will humiliate you in front of your peers. Dilbert: I quit. Alice: I quit. Boss: Would it work better if I wore a black shirt?

Bad Analogy Guy Fits In

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bad Analogy Guy Fits In - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #insults, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Hi. I'm the bad analogy guy. I can't tell the difference between thinking and simply being reminded of unrelated things. Wally: You'll fit in well here. Man: You dress like a liar.