Won't Answer Comic Strips - Page 7

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529 Results for Won't Answer

View 61 - 70 results for won't answer comic strips. Discover the best "Won't Answer" comics from Dilbert.com.

I Own You

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I Own You - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 06, 2016's comic on:


Tags #honesty, #work ethic, #communication, #text, #control

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Boss: Why didn't you answer my text last night? Dilbert: Um... Boss: You have no social life, and you aren't dead, so there's no excuse. I own you! Dilbert: Whoever said honest is refreshing never heard any.

Wally Replaces Himself With Chatbot

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Wally Replaces Himself With Chatbot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2016's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #working from home, #work ethic, #technology, #bot

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Wally: I got approval to work from home. My chatbot will answer all of my emails and text messages. Dilbert: Chatbot answers would be useless. Wally: I hope so. Otherwise it wouldn't sound like me.

Wally Heads Up Ai Project

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Wally Heads Up Ai Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 2016's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #project, #fake

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Boss: Wally, I need you to head up our artificial intelligence project. You will have no budget and no hope of success. I just like saying we're working on AI. And you're completely useless, so it's a good match. Wally: I won't let you down.

Managing Your Boss

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Managing Your Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #management, #accountability, #blame, #time, #time management

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Boss: Your project is three weeks behind schedule. Dilbert: That's the exact amount of time I was waiting for you to answer my questions. Boss: You need to manage me better. Dilbert: Okay, you're fired.

Loud Howard And Tina Have A Romance

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Loud Howard And Tina Have A Romance - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2016's comic on:


Tags #romance, #relationships, #dating, #secret, #speaking, #loud, #shouting

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Loud Howard. Tina: We must keep our office romance a secret. Howard: I won't tell anyone about us, Tina!!!! Dilbert: You have a bad case of Loud Howard hair. But what does the extra spittle mean? Hmmm... Tina: Grrrr...

Ted Knows That Dilbert Knows

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Ted Knows That Dilbert Knows - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 05, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #bad advice, #secret, #gratitude

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Dilbert: Ted knows that I know something about his project. Now he won't stop hounding me. I don't know what to do. Wally: Try dousing him with coffee. Dilbert: Your advice is terrible. Wally: You're coming off as ungrateful.

Don't Read Long Emails

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Don't Read Long Emails - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 13, 2016's comic on:


Tags #email, #tldr, #communication, #assumption, #honesty

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Man: You didn't answer my email. Dilbert: I don't read long email messages. Long emails are a sign of a disorganized mind. I try to avoid contact with that sort of person. Man: And yet, here I am. Dilbert: I didn't say it works every time.

Dilbert Gets Ready To Babysit

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Dilbert Gets Ready To Babysit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #parent, #Parenting, #babysitter, #babysitting, #children, #listening, #Family

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Dilbert: Is there anything I need to know before I babysit your kids tonight? Carol: They won't do anything you ask, and they don't respond to threats or consequences. Dilbert: So... what am I supposed to do? Carol: Try finding some idiot to babysit for you.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2016's comic on:


Tags #demands, #bosses, #unrealistic, #frustration, #outburst, #catch-22, #travel, #air travel

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Boss: Carol, move my flight one hour earlier Friday. Carol: Do you have any idea how hard that would be? I know it sounds easy, but it won't be. Not at this late date. Not with all your pickiness. When I fail, you will think I didn't look hard enough for a new flight. I can't prove a negative, so I will forever suffer your disdain. My career is ruined. Boss: Never mind! Forget it! Why is it so hard to ask you to do anything? Carol: I've been telling people you're stupid, but I'm open to other theories.

Humans Hold Domininion

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Humans Hold Domininion - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #temperature, #humans, #nature, #thermostat, #robots, #technology, #evolution, #fragility

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Dilbert: My brain won't work when the office is warmer than 72. Carol: It has to be at least 74 or I'll freeze. Robot: What's it like to hold dominion over the Earth within a narrow band of temperatures that can't coexist? Dilbert: Was that a joke? Carol: I'm too cold to think?