Free Will Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Free Will

View 61 - 70 results for Free-will comic strips. Discover the best "Free Will" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #app store, #created app, #dream killer, #first name, #free apps, #madonna, #sell a million, #mother, #Family

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I spent four months creating this app, mom. I think I can sell a million of them for $3.99. Mom: I saw seven apps just like this in the app store and five of them were free. Dilbert: Thanks for the feedback, dream-killer. Mom: Have you ever thought of just using your first name, like Madonna?

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computer software, #free software, #run slow, #upgrades, #office, #cubicles, #free

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Want some free software? Boss: What's it do? Dogbert: All it does is beg you for upgrades. And if you upgrade, then it begs you to upgrade again and so on. And it makes all of you other software run slow. Boss: And it's free?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #being a jerk, #big picture, #breaking up tasks, #emotionally gutted, #engineer, #engineers, #individual tasks, #losing will to live, #meetings, #personal life, #project plan, #rational plan, #sense of purpose, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Any comments on the project plan? Dilbert: When you consider all of the tasks together, they form a rational plan. But our individual tasks are so far removed from the big picture that they are stripped of meaning. You've managed to remove all sense of purpose from my life. On an intellectual level, I understand the benefits of breaking tasks into small chunks. But you've left me emotionally gutted. As I read your plan, I'm losing my will to live. Boss: Can't you find meaning in your personal life? Tina: He's an engineer. Dilbert: Now you're just being a jerk.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #free app, #stealing personal info, #lodge complaint, #monthly subscription, #package, #history of contaxcts, #sells itself

View Transcript

Transcript

Customer: Your free app is stealing my personal information. I'd like to lodge a complaint. Dogbert: Buy our monthly subscription package or I'll send your browser history to your contacts. Dilbert: How's your app going? Dogbert: It practically sells itself.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #car, #friends, #radio

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "A friend is somebody who will not think less of you for singing the 'ooh-ooh!' part of a song on the radio." Dilbert and Dogbert ride in the car listening to the radio. Dilbert sings, "Oooh-oooh!!" The caption says, "Of course, friends will also feel free to express their musical opinions." Dilbert lies in a ditch as the car speeds off.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #free, #hypnosis, #lessons, #friends, #class

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks down the sidewalk and sees a sign on a building that says, "Free Hypnosis Lessons!" Dilbert thinks, "Hmm . . ." Dilbert thinks, "There's probably some catch, but it's worth a look." Dilbert walks away from the building wearing nothing but his boxer shorts and holding his arms out in front of him. Dilbert says, ". . . A wonderful class . . . I must tell my friends."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #dissolving, #free, #dawn, #bob, #ugly, #dance, #cult

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs, "I'm dissolving the cult. You two are free to do as you please." Bob and Dawn dance and yell, "We're free! We're free!" Dogbert says, "Boy . . . You don't know ugly 'til you've seen dinosaurs dance."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #scientist, #laboratory, #will power, #escape, #engineering, #experiment

View Transcript

Transcript

Scientist: Ahaaa! There's my runaway lab rat! I'd recognize little XP-39C2 anywhere! All is forgiven come back to your job at the lab. I love. Scientist: He was specially bred to have no will power. Lab Rat: Hold me.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #bob, #custody, #invention, #dinosaurs, #will, #death

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob the Dinosaur asks Dogbert, "What did Dilbert leave you in his will?" Dogbert replies, "He stiffed me." Dogbert holds a device and explains, "All I got is custody of this stupid invention of his . . . I don't even know what it does." Bob says, "I get it . . . He 'stiffed' you . . . Hee-hee!" Dogbert says, "Try to stay with me, Bob."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #judicial proceedings, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #valuable, #society, #free, #jury duty, #lives, #letter, #civic duty

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert reads a letter and says, "What a stupid waste of my valuable time." Dilbert says, "It's your civic duty. It's the small dues you pay for living in a just and free society." Dogbert replies, "Big whoopee." Dilbert says, "And you get to play God with other people's lives." Dogbert says, "Well, they should say that in the letter."