Asok In Hr Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Asok In Hr

View 61 - 70 results for asok in hr comic strips. Discover the best "Asok In Hr" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally Mentors To Death

Thank you for voting.
Wally Mentors To Death - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 27, 2018's comic on:


Tags #asok, #Wally, #successful, #definition, #minimum, #alive, #employed, #comas, #ruling

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Have you ever mentored anyone who went on to be successful? Wally: Depends on your definition of success. Asok: Well, at minimum, they'd need to be alive and gainfully employed. Wally: What's your ruling on comas?

Dogbert Throws Penalty Flag

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert Throws Penalty Flag - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 19, 2018's comic on:


Tags #alice, #the boss, #asok, #Wally, #Dilbert, #accomplish, #addicted, #apps, #fortnite, #slept, #losers, #podcast

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I accomplished nothing this week because I'm addicted to apps on my phone. I haven't slept in three days because of my "Fortnite" habit. The Boss: What about the rest of you losers? Asok: Shhh. I got a one-ear podcast going here.

Asok Lives In The Office

Thank you for voting.
Asok Lives In The Office - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 17, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #cost, #criticism, #house, #office, #office workers, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: All of you should be more like Asok. He is in the office before I arrive and still here when I go home. Asok: That is because housing costs are so high that I live here in the office and sleep in a bathroom stall. Boss: That still leaves a lot of stalls for the rest of you.

Asok Moves Into A Pod

Thank you for voting.
Asok Moves Into A Pod - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 2019's comic on:


Tags #employment, #finances, #home, #money, #office workers, #salary, #apartment

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Thanks to my raise, I can afford to move out of my home in the men's restroom stall and into a pod. Dilbert: A pod? Asok: A pod! Dilbert: Is it better than the stall? Asok: It's smaller, but better appointed.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 26, 2011's comic on:


Tags #prejudice, #universities & colleges, #updating employee profiles, #school. indian institute of technology, #double major, #engineering, #false humility, #combined thesis, #terraformed planet

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol says, "Hey, Asok. I'm updating our employee profiles. Where'd you go to school?" Asok says, "I graduated from the Indian Institute of Technology in Lucknow with a double major in engineering and physics, and a minor in false humility." Asok says, "For my combined thesis I terraformed a planet in another dimension and didn't tell anyone." Carol says, "I'll put 'Indian.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 28, 2011's comic on:


Tags #dual core processors, #brain, #disconcerting, #email answer

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "To answer your question faster, I'll need to use the two halves of my brain like dual core processors." Asok says, "I'm only warning you because it might be disconcerting to watch." Woman says, "How bad could it be?" Asok says, "Wah-ah-geeee!" Woman says, "Maybe you can e-mail me your answer."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 2011's comic on:


Tags #engineers, #managers & supervisors, #ventriloquism, #finishing projects, #early, #powerpoint, #presentation, #executive retreat, #dead boss hand puppet, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Man says, "The engineering department is finishing all of their projects early and we don't know why." CEO says, "Tell them to do a powerpoint presentation at the next executive retreat to share their methods." Asok says, "Now it's my turn to use the dead boss hand puppet!" Alice says, "Uh-oh."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 2011's comic on:


Tags #inventions, #managers & supervisors, #portal, #parallel uiverse, #more prodcutive, #universe, #cops, #alice killed boss, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, "I created a portal to a parallel universe. My success was possible because Alice killed our boss so we are all more productive." Alice says, "Step aside. The cops have been sniffing around and I need something from the other universe." Alice says, "Look on the bright side, Asok. Some other universe just got a lot more productive."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 22, 2011's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #office workers, #mindless task, #intern, #time, #little value, #jump out, #nice way to say

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Asok, there's no nice way to say this... do this mindless task for me because you're nothing but an intern and your time has very little value. Asok: There probably was a nice way to say that. Dilbert: It didn't jump out.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 10, 2011's comic on:


Tags #anxiety, #stress, #meltdown cubicle, #theoretical workload limit, #brains full, #becomes overdue, #projects overdue, #tasks, #urgent, #funny noise, #missed dead line

View Transcript

Transcript

Voice: Meltdown in cubicle 459540! Dilbert: That's Te. He must have reached his T.W.L. Asok: His what? Dilbert: Theoretical workload limit. In layman's terms, his brain is full. It starts when just one of your projects becomes overdue. You end up spending all of your time explaining why you didn't get it done. That makes all of your other projects overdue. When ever task become urgent, your brain can't decide what to do next. Brains make a funny noise when they shut down. Noise: Poink. Asok: Uh-oh. I just missed a deadline. Wally: And so it begins.