Bad Managers Comic Strips - Page 7
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Share March 19, 1992's comic on:
Dogbert walks outdoors thinking, "It's easy to make insecure people insult themselves." Dogbert says to a woman, "Good morning, ma'am. You look thin and sexy today!" The woman replies, "Sexy?! Ha! I'm a whale . . . A whale with a bad hairdo!" Dogbert walks away humming and thinking, "Next."
Share August 18, 1992's comic on:
Dogbert sits at a desk in front of a sign that says, "Marriage Counselor." A man and a woman sit across from him. Dogbert continues, "I recommend massive plastic surgery for both of you . . . And your personalities are bad, too; pretend to be other people." The man or the woman asks, "Should we try to communicate more?" Dogbert replies, "No, that's just begging for trouble."
Share November 26, 1992's comic on:
Beaver: When you're a lazy beaver, you try to find shortcuts and tricks to get your work done. I got this daytime planner to organize my day efficiently. But all it does is sit there. Dogbert: Looks like you got a bad one.
Share February 24, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert reaches into a hole and says to Dogbert, "I'm going to pull Ratbert out of the hole in space before anything bad happens." Ratbert tells Dilbert and Dogbert, ". . . Although only a minute passed in this dimension, I've been floating in the other dimension for three hundred thousand years." Dilbert says, "Wow! It's lucky I didn't reach in there with my watch hand!" Ratbert yells, "Yes I was bored!!! Thanks for asking!!"
Share December 06, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert stands behind a broken desk chair and says into the phone, "My chair is broken. Can you send a new one from the warehouse?" A man at a desk replies, "No can do, my friend. All we have is chairs with deluxe armrests. They're only for managers who are one level higher than you." The man says, "What do I suggest? I dunno . . . Maybe take some classes at night. I'm sure you can get promoted eventually."
Share January 25, 1994's comic on:
Dilbert: The corporate office sent me to head up the Elbonian satellite launching program. Elbanian: ooh...bad timing. The french delivered their satellite early. we already tried to launch it with the town slingshot. Dilbert: It doesn't get much worse than this. Elbonain: It flattened the french embassy. They declared war an hour ago.
Share March 19, 1994's comic on:
The Boss: Susan, Im reorganizing the department again. The budget you worked on for months its now worthless. Susan: I think when you have bad news you should make an effort to break it gradually, maybe build yup to it. The Boss: Oh, that reminds me: You're fired.
Share April 06, 1994's comic on:
DOGBERT: If you want to get promoted , say bad things about co workers so you look better by comparison. Dilbert: Geez, Lisa, It looks like you've been hotting the donuts pretty hard lately. Dilbert: heh-hehe...big things are coming my way soon.
Share April 09, 1994's comic on:
"Value priced lottery tickets" Ratbert: "I am drawn by the allure of fabulous wealth and a life of hedonistic delight...one please." "This is dated yesterday." Dogbert: "Ooh, bad luck. Try again?"
Share April 30, 1994's comic on:
"If we know our senior executive is making a bad decision, shouldn't we tell her?" "Hmm, yes. Let's end our careers by challenging a decision that won't change. That's a great idea." "I'm getting mixed signals here." "And let's pull our neckties until it hurts!"