Classic Excuses Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

66 Results for Classic Excuses

View 61 - 66 results for classic excuses comic strips. Discover the best "Classic Excuses" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #distraction, #procrastination, #work ethic, #excuses, #productivity

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I have one hour to get some work done before my meeting. But I can't concentrate when i"m hungry, so I need a shack. This snack is making me thirsty. The label on this shirt is bugging me. I need to cut it off. Q quick trip to the restroom and then I can get down to work. Ugh. I have fifteen messages since I left my desk. Now it's too close to my meeting to start a new task. Dogbert: How's work? Dilbert: How would I know?

Wally's Best Play

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Best Play - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #excuses, #laziness, #work ethic, #deadline

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: There are many, many reasons why my project is late and over budget. Boss: Do any of those reasons not involve your incompetence and sloth? Wally: I think my best play here is to be offended by the question.

Wally's Doctor Note

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Doctor Note - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #doctors, #employees, #excuses, #work, #writing

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Here's the note from my doctor that you asked for. Boss: I can't read the handwriting. Wally: That's how you know it's a real doctor's note. Boss: What's it say. Wally: It says I need lots of sleep at work.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #angry, #business, #office workers, #sarcasm

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you finish the product redesign? Dilbert: You never told me to redesign the product. Boss: I don't want any excuses! Dilbert: You never told me to redesign anything. Boss: Whoa! Leave your pretzel logic at home. You need to learn how to take responsibility for your failures. Dilbert: Okay...I take full responsiblity for you not telling me what you wanted me to do. Boss: You're not doing it right. Dilbert: Should I slap myself while saying it?

Elbonian Spy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Elbonian Spy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #face mask, #coronavirus, #spy, #foreigner, #data, #security, #racist, #excuse

View Transcript

Transcript

boss wearing face mask: our data security team informs me we have an elbonian spy in our midst. dilbert wearing face mask: maybe it's this elbonian guy you hired. elbonian wearing face mask: whoa, that is super racist. dilbert: is it you? elbonian: yes, but i don't see how that excuses you.

Emergency Project

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Emergency Project - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring, #boss, #emergency, #excuses, #office workers, #technology, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you have any emergencies for me to work on? Boss: I do. Dilbert: Perfect! I needed an excuse to avoid working on the boring parts of my job. Boss: I also need your status report by end of day. Dilbert: I would totally do that if not for this darned emergency.