Commute To Sit In Box Comic Strips - Page 7

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View 61 - 70 results for commute to sit in box comic strips. Discover the best "Commute To Sit In Box" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 2008's comic on:


Tags #asok, #intern, #indian institute of technology, #30 years in box, #punished to box

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Man says, "Asok, you have violated the Indian Institute of Technology's ban on the use of telekinesis in the ungifted world." Man says, "Your punishment is 30 years in the box." Dilbert says, "Where were you this morning?" Asok The Intern says, "Grrrrr"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 2010's comic on:


Tags #victor, #quit, #project, #take over, #tools, #glowing box, #hold, #nightlight, #finish

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The Boss says, "Victor quit. I need you to take over his project." Dilbert says, "Did he leave any documentation?" The Boss says, "No, but it's obviously some sort of glowing box. That should be enough to get your started." The Boss says, "Can you finish it by Monday?" Dilbert says, "If it's a nightlight, I can finish it by today."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 15, 2010's comic on:


Tags #present, #software engineer, #give, #program, #product, #box, #hand, #receive, #look, #Features, #criticize, #depressed, #first copy

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The Boss says, "As lead software engineer, I give you the first unit of our ten thousand copy production run." Dilbert says, "Wow! I wish we'd designed it with the features listed on the box. That would have been awesome." The Boss says, "What?" Dilbert says, "I'll put this with the other reminders of how my life could have been excellent."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 21, 2007's comic on:


Tags #checked box, #drink more, #face lift, #long neck, #see over cubicles, #too high, #disproportinate

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"Then I found out there are two kinds of face-lifts." "I accidentally checked the box for the kind that lets you see over the top of your cubicle." "So I try to drink more, but that isn't working out either."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 23, 2007's comic on:


Tags #dreams, #childhood dreams, #fabric covered box, #living proof, #Women, #don't like winners, #excuse for rejection

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Dilbert: "When I was a boy, I dreamed of one day working in a fabric-covered box." "I'm living proof that dreams can come true." "Women don't like winners either."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 03, 2002's comic on:


Tags #away from home more, #career advice, #good advice, #hearing it, #hideous commute, #longer hours, #no growth potential, #self loathing, #unhappiness

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Dilbert is at home in his bathrobe. He says to Dogbert, "I need career advice." Dogbert replies, "You came to the right place." Dilbert says, "Should I keep my comfortable job that has no growth potential?" Dilbert continues, "Or should I take a better job with longer hours and a hideous commute?" Dogbert answers, "The first choice is a sure path to self-loathing and unhappiness." Dogbert continues, "The second choice will squeeze the life out of you like a vise on a peach." Dogbert continues, "You really can't win. So I recommend the choice that keeps you away from home more." Dogbert continues, "Because frankly - and I'll try to say this delicately - a little bit of you goes a long way." Dogbert concludes, "That's the problem with good advice. No one wants to hear it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2002's comic on:


Tags #make box bluer, #micromanaging, #blood smaple, #microscope, #manage cellular level, #erwin schrodinger, #quantum level, #free gifts, #white blood cells, #say hi

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Alice is sitting at her computer. The Boss approaches and says, "Make the box bluer." The Boss continues, "A little more.. A little more... A little more.." Alice interrupts, "That's it!!" Alice opens her drawer and exclaims, "When you get tired of micromanaging me..." Alice hands The Boss a cup of blood and continues, "Put this sample of my blood under a microscope so you can manage me on a cellular level." Alice continues yelling, "And here's a book by Erwin Schrodinger in case you'd like to manage me on a quantum level!" Alice screams, "Do you understand what I'm saying?" The Boss walks out carrying the blood sample and book. He thinks, "Free gifts." The Boss sits at his desk and says to the blood sample, "Now I want all of you white blood cells to spell 'Hi.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 27, 2000's comic on:


Tags #replaced computers, #training class, #ignored requests, #sit unused, #slow way, #computer manual, #no time, #class, #coat, #invest, #plan future

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Girl: So they replaced our computers and never trained us. I told them we needed a training class but they ignored my requests. So our computers sit there unused while we do our work the slow way. Dilbert: why don't you real the computer manual? Girl: I don't have time for that! Dilbert: But you have time for a class? It doesn't add up. Girl: Im cold. Dilbert: You should try wearing a coat. they're terrific.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 17, 2013's comic on:


Tags #illness, #laziness, #sitting disease, #sit all day, #bad health, #safety more eimportant, #drink coffee instead

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Wally: I've got a bad case of something the experts call "sitting disease." Studies show that people who sit all day for their jobs have 40% greater chance of dying in the next three years. Company policy says safety is more important than productivity, right? Boss: Um... sort of. Wally: So instead of sitting at my desk working, I plan to walk around and drink coffee. For safety reasons. Boss: GO sit at your desk or you're fired. There's a good chance this problem will resolve itself within three years.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 2013's comic on:


Tags #competition (psychology), #thinking, #ceos technology challenge, #innovative ideas, #fresh water, #elbonia, #award winning ideas, #water in a box

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CEO: I'm proud to announce the winner in the CEO's technology challenge. Two weeks ago, I challenged you to come up with innovative ideas for getting fresh water to Elbonia. The winner is someone named Wally. Wally's idea for bringing fresh water to Elbonia is... "in a box." That's the best one? Boss: We only had one entry. CEO: I hate your bald guts. Wally: I get that a lot. If you need me, I'll be in my cubicle thinking up award-winning ideas.