Dating App Comic Strips - Page 7

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199 Results for Dating App

View 61 - 70 results for dating app comic strips. Discover the best "Dating App" comics from Dilbert.com.

Click Rate On Death Alerts

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Click Rate On Death Alerts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #advertising, #technology, #analytics, #smart watch, #app, #ad, #click, #clickbait, #attention, #distraction

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Boss: Our health app accurately predicts the user's time of death and sends a five-minute warning. Our business model is paid advertising that we disguise as "death alerts." CEO: How's the click-through rate? Boss: Surprisingly low. It's hard to get people's attention these days.

Alice Attracts Wrong Guys

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Alice Attracts Wrong Guys - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stalk, #stalker, #stalking, #dating, #drone, #spying, #spy, #relationships

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Alice: I have a history of dating men who become stalkers. But I have a good feeling about this new guy. He shows no stalker tendencies at all. Dilbert: What's he do for a living? Alice: Aerial photography using drones.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #app, #developer, #workload, #ideas, #obliviousness, #unrealistic, #goals

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Tina: I have a great idea for an app. And I choose you to be on my start-up team. I'll be the idea person and you do all of the technology. Dilbert: So... I would be doing 100 percent of the work? Tina: I already did the hard part of coming up with an idea. Your part is just typing. So stop complaining and type me an app. Dilbert: It isn't that easy. Tina: Can you recommend someone less lazy?

Ambitious Men

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Ambitious Men - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #rude, #honesty, #ambition, #insult, #relationships

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Woman: I like ambitious men. Are you ambitious? Dilbert: Not especially. For example, I settled for dating you. Woman: That's a terrible thing to say. Dilbert: You're the one who brought it up.

Judging The Robot

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Judging The Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #robot, #relationships, #free will, #personality, #insult, #psychology

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Dilbert: I hear you're dating our office robot. Alice: Stop judging me. Dilbert: I'm not judging you. Alice: Good. Dilbert: I'm judging the robot. Alice: Ouch.

App For A Better Boss

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App For A Better Boss  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #invention, #mind control, #neural interface

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Dilbert: The neural interface is live. His brain is now communicating with his phone. Alice: He's sending me a brain-text. It says "Please help me. My phone has taken control of my body." Dilbert: It worked! Alice: Now we just need to write an app that makes him a better boss.

Boss Is Like A Zombie With No App

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Boss Is Like A Zombie With No App  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mind control, #technology, #invention, #zombie

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Dilbert: Thanks to my new neural interface, I can control our boss using an app. I haven't written the app yet, so all he does is sit there like a zombie. Wally: Maybe we can skip the app. Alice: There's no reason to over-engineer it.

App For Jumping Off The Roof

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App For Jumping Off The Roof  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #mind control, #technology, #invention, #suicide, #murder, #legal issues, #reasonable doubt

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Dilbert: Maybe we should remove the neural interface so his natural brain works again. Alice: Or... and this is just a thought-- we could create an app that makes him jump off the roof. Dilbert: Would that be murder or suicide? Alice: All we need is reasonable doubt.

Animal Testing Is Done

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 Animal Testing Is Done - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #app, #technology, #addiction, #morals, #big business, #ethics

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Dilbert: The animal testing for our app is done. The app is so addictive that Zimbu the monkey was hospitalized for starvation while using it. I think we all know what we need to do. Boss: Submit it to the app store?

Zimbu Tests The App

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 Zimbu Tests The App - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #technology, #addiction, #stimulus, #animal testing, #social media

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Narrator: Zimbu The Monkey. Dilbert: We need to do animal testing on our new app. Do you mind taking a look? Zimbu: I'm getting a strong dopamine hit every time I click on it. Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Dilbert: May I have it back? Zimbu: Put that hand away before I bite it off.