Erase Hard Drive Comic Strips - Page 7

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416 Results for Erase Hard Drive

View 61 - 70 results for erase hard drive comic strips. Discover the best "Erase Hard Drive" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #evil hr director, #offered stock incentives, #working hard enogh, #beating customers

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Catbert, now acting as the Evil H.R. director, aks Dilbert "Would you work harder if we offerec stock incentives." Dilbert responds, "Yes." Catbert asks, "So you admit you're not working hard enough now?" Dilbert replies unsure "Umm..." Catbert goes on to ask Dilbert, "Lastly, are you still beating up customers?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice date, #cafe, #dinner date, #drive boss nuts, #honesty, #indifference arouses, #using you, #vp and engineer

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VP: Alice, maybe we shouldn't date, Im a Vp and you're an engineer in my division. Alice: Sheesh, Get over yourself. IM just using you to drive my boss nuts, VP: Your indifference arouses me! I will make you mine! Alice: VPs

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hire another engineer, #last minute, #cost saving s awards, #plan to hire, #work twice as hard

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "I had planned to hire another engineer." The Boss continues, "At the last minute I rememered I could just make you work twice as hard." The Boss says to Dilbert, "Maybe you could nominate me for one of those cost saving awards."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #kiss daughter goodnight, #working too hard

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A man is standing in front of the boss. The man says, "You're working me too hard! I want to get home in time to kiss my daughter goodnight!" The man continues, "And I'm not the only one who feels this way." The boss says, "I've seen your daughter and I'm fairly certain you're the only one."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #motivation fairy, #work hard, #gain respect, #peers, #avoid stress, #out live peers, #hard work

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THE MOTIVATION FAIRY: Hovering in the air near Wally, the Fairy says, "If you work hard, you will gain the respect of your peers." Wally says to the hovering Motivation Fairy, "If I avoid the stress of hard work, I will out-live my peers." The Fairy asks, "Hard work can kill me?" Wally answers, "If you're lucky."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hard work, #signing praises, #then die, #reality, #inspirational speeches

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "If you work hard, you can achieve great things!" The Boss says, "And then you die." Wally, Dilbert and Alice weep as The Boss says, "It never pays to mix reality with inspirational speeches."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad data, #data, #grossly inaccurate, #managing is hard

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "All of our data is grossly inaccurate... but I need data in order to manage." The Boss continues, "If I concentrate hard enough I can forget that the data is bad. Then I can use it." Wally and Dilbert watch as The Boss shakes with clenched teeth. Wally says, "I have to give him credit.; managing is harder than it looks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job market, #bad job market, #how hard, #unemployed, #leader

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Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches from behind and asks, "How's the ol' job market lately? It's pretty bad, isn't it?" The Boss continues, "So no matter how hard I make you work it's still better than being unemployed." Dilbert turns in surprise. The Boss says, "Who's your leader? Go on, say it." Dilbert puts his head in his hands and replies quietly, "You are."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #across bridge, #hard work, #intern, #carpool lane, #business

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Alice has a briefcase in her hand. She says to Asok, "Asok, you're coming with me to an important meeting across the bridge." Asok is sitting at his computer. He thinks to himself, "Important!" Alice and Asok are walking. Asok says, "My hard work as an intern is paying off. Already I am invited to an important meeting!" Alice and Asok are driving past traffic. Asok exclaims, "Hey, we get the carpool lane!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hard work, #nights, #weekends, #demand 10 percent

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Alice is sitting at her computer. She looks thoroughly disheveled. The Boss says to her, "Alice, all of your hard work - the nights and the weekends - are finally paying off." The Boss continues, "We increased our five-year forecast of demand by ten percent!" Alice responds, "You changed a wild guess by ten percent?" The Boss replies, "Thanks to you!"