Fake Buy In Comic Strips - Page 7
322 Results for Fake Buy In
View 61 - 70 results for fake buy in comic strips. Discover the best "Fake Buy In" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share December 16, 2004's comic on:
Tv stock analyst Do you own stock in the company you recommended? No, I used my blackberry ti dump my shares as soon as they spiked front my recommendation. This is very wrong now I'm using the profit to buy a helicopter.
Share May 16, 1999's comic on:
Wally sits in a metting between Dilbert and Alice. Wally thinks, "I'll have to be proactive to escape this boring meeting." Wally takes a sip from his coffee and thinks, "I'll fake my own death and hope someone drags me into the hallway." Wally says, "Ack!! My coffee is poisoned!" Wally lies on the ground feet in the air. Dilbert says, "Maybe we should drag him into the hallway." Alice says, "No." Alice says, "Let's wait for him to stiffen. Then he'll be easier to drag." Ted says, "We should pose him before he stiffens." Dilbert says, "Something obscene?" Alice says, "Or spread eagle, so he won't fit in a casket." Wally lies on the grouns arms and legs wide with his coffe cup pearched on his face and thinks, "It never pays to be the proactive one."
Share April 18, 2005's comic on:
Dilbert: Our vendors rep says they can't deliver the parts for three months. The Boss: that just means he promised the parts to some other customer who did a better job of threatening him. Dilbert: How about if I say we'll never buy from you gain? vendor: Id say you're not exactly buying form us now.
Share June 01, 2005's comic on:
"I think I'm in love with the new guy because of his fake British accent." "He's mine!" "You're married." "I am? Wow! His British accent made me forget." "I say, old beans, did anyone see my brolly on the lift?" "Swoon" "I'm single."
Share August 12, 2005's comic on:
"I have a new hobby. It's called phishing." "I send fake banking e-mails to gullible executives. Then I find out their financial information and use it to steal the money they don't deserve." Dear Customer, This is your bank. We forgot your social security number and password. Why don't you send them to us so we can protect your money. Sincerely, I. B. Banker "Looks legit."
Share November 18, 2005's comic on:
Share May 28, 2000's comic on:
Dilbert walks by an open office door and hears, "Pssst!" Dilbert walks in and says, "Yes?" The Boss says, "Come in and shut the door." The Boss continues, "I bought a fake video surveillance camera." The Boss holds the Boss and says, "Install it in the break room tonight." The Boss continues, "It's cheaper than a real camera and it will discourage thefts." Dilbert says, "If you treat employees like criminals, they'll leave." The Boss says, "Good point. You'd better hide the fake camera so no one knows it's there." Dilbert puts the box in the trash and walks away whistling."
Share January 27, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: Asok, your assignment is to buy a display case for our awards. Then go to the store and buy a bunch of awards because we don't have any. Asok: The next one is for 'Best Unethical Filling of an Awards Showcase.
Share February 23, 2007's comic on:
Dogbert: Thanks to my P.R. campaign, your stock price is grossly over-inflated." "Now you can use your stock to buy companies that actually make money." "After you manage those companies into the toilet, give me a jingle."
Share August 15, 2012's comic on:
CEO: Google offered to buy our company for $100 million just to get our engineers. Dilbert: Huh. I wonder if I can convince the other engineers to jump ship today and share $100 million amongst us. CEO: What did he just say? Dilbert: Nothing. Just thinking out loud.