Great Book Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

476 Results for Great Book

View 61 - 70 results for great book comic strips. Discover the best "Great Book" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 23, 1999's comic on:


Tags #great turnaround ceo, #turn around, #head in hand

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok comes up to the new CEO sitting at his desk and who looks like the devil and says, "Everyone says you're a great turnaround CEO." Asok continues, "What does it take to turn around a company like this one?' Asok is walking off, holding his head under his arm and the head is thinking, "I guess it's better to not be noticed the first month."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 04, 2000's comic on:


Tags #away from job, #blah blah, #cell phones, #jurors, #jury duty, #jury room, #read book, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: AAHH, One week away from my job. Jury room Dilbert: I'll have hours of quiet time to read my new book, woman: There's a guy here with a book.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 1999's comic on:


Tags #how to book, #teach people, #winning lottery numbers, #find free real estate, #lose weight, #tubs of ice cream, #strong abs, #see angels, #near death experience, #get rid witnesses

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at Dilberts computer. Dilbert stands in a robe with a cup of coffee. Dogbert says, "I'm writing a comprehensive "how to" book." Dogbert says, "In chapter one, I teach people how to pick winning lottery numbers." Dogbert says, "Chapter two: How to find free real estate in very nice neighborhoods." Dogbert says, "Chapter three: how to lose weight by eating huge tubs of ice cream." Dogbert says, "Chapter four: how to build strong abs by joining a gym and never going." Dogbert says, "Finally, how to see angels by giving yourself a near death experience." Dogbert says, "That last one is just to get rid of all the witnesses." Dilbert thinks, "On the plus side I don't feel so bad about not recycling."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 2001's comic on:


Tags #whos incredible list, #can buy book, #leather bound, #gullible

View Transcript

Transcript

Looking at a piece of paper, Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Wow! I've been selected for the 'Who's Incredible' list!" Dilbert continues to Dogbert, "For seventy-five dollars I can buy a leather-bound book with my name in it!" Dilbert says, "Ha! And people said I was too gullible to be a success!" Dogbert reads the piece of paper, "Dear Occupant."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 18, 2001's comic on:


Tags #stock market expert, #core holding, #dead cat bounce, #secret economic model, #book sales, #financial markets

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Stock Market Expert. Dogbert is seen through a TV screen. He says, "If your core holding is a falling knife, you can dollar cost average through the dead cat bounce." A man is watching TV on his couch. Dogbert's voice continues, "My secret economic model says you should change your cash allocation from 12.4% to 12.3%." Dogbert and the TV interviewer are seen through a spilt screen on the TV. Dogbert says, "My new book is, 'If you aren't churning, you aren't learning." The interviewer replies, "Don't come back."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 31, 2001's comic on:


Tags #morale boosting, #great idea, #first meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Carol, "Carol, I want you to help me put together a morale boosting event." Carol responds, "Great idea. And after that maybe I can do CPR on a mummy and see if I can save its life." The Boss responds, "Our first meeting will be Tuesday." Carol exclaims, "Do you hear what I'm saying?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2002's comic on:


Tags #sales training, #sell to customer, #dare to be great, #prove worthiness, #beg

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Sales Training. The speaker says, "Never sell to your customer. Make your customer sell to you." The speaker continues, "Our products are only for those who dare to be great! Make the customer explain why he is worthy." Dilbert is meeting with a customer. Dilbert says, "You heard me, Goober. Now beg for our product."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 2002's comic on:


Tags #successful fish market, #inspirational book, #characters, #book, #title characters, #depressing

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Wally, "I'm giving everyone on my staff this inspirational book about a successful fish market!" The Boss continues, "I want you to be like the characters in the book." Wally says to Dilbert, "The title characters get captured, tossed around and eaten." Dilbert looks at the book and says, "Depressing."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 2002's comic on:


Tags #choose attitudes, #dopey, #gullible, #book

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Alice and says, "Alice, according to this book, people can choose their attitudes." Alice replies, "So you decided to go with a dopey and gullible theme?" The Boss fumes with anger. Alice says, "And that's another interesting choice. Now I see how this works."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 01, 2002's comic on:


Tags #defective copy, #employees still low, #low morale, #motivational book, #thinking

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Catbert, "I read this motivational book and yet the employees still have low morale." Catbert responds, "Maybe you have a defective copy. You should compare it to another one and see what's different." The Boss asks, "What if the second one is defective too?" Catbert replies, "Sheesh... It's like I'm doing all of your thinking here."