Internet Comic Strips - Page 7
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Character
209 Results for Internet
View 61 - 70 results for internet comic strips. Discover the best "Internet" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 30,
2005
Tags habitual liar, ordered on internet, resist free stuff
Transcript
Dilbert: "Karl, you're a habitual liar but these pills that I ordered over the internet will cure you." Karl: "I've never lied in my life, but I can't resist free stuff." Dilbert: "Um... Are you alive?" Karl: "Never felt better!"
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday July 21,
2005
Tags elbonia bid, nuclear war head, plans, internet, few things modified, ginat toaster, enriched bread, technology
Transcript
"We won the Elbonia bid, but I had to promise we'd give them plans to build a nuclear warhead." "Don't worry. I got the plans off the Internet and I modified a few things." "Now all we need is some highly enriched bread."
Sunday October 21,
2012
Tags internet & world wide web, cloudwash, argon, smart people, software to cloud
Transcript
Boss: I need you to cloudwash our software. Dilbert: Cloudwash? Boss: Move some of its functions onto the internet, but call the internet a cloud. No one will take us seriously unless we're doing something in the cloud. Dilbert: Will people take us seriously if we make technology decisions based on jargon? Boss: We don't care what smart people think. There aren't many of them. We only need to convince our dumb customers. Dumb people believe anything. Dilbert: Do you believe I moved our software to the cloud yesterday? Boss: You did? Dilbert: I'm going to say yes.
Saturday February 02,
2013
Tags death & dying, internet & world wide web, extreme sports, basejump, space station, machine learning, inetrnational
Transcript
Computer: Based on your internet history, you might be dumb enough to enjoy extreme sports. Click here to buy a ticket to base jump from the International Space Station. Boss: I think the internet is trying to kill me. Dilbert: We call it "machine learning."
Saturday April 13,
2013
Tags internet & world wide web, revenge, killed robot, uploaded personality, internet, decommissioned it, subroutines, haunting, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: You killed our robot. Alice: He had it coming. Dilbert: Are you aware that it uploaded its personality to the internet before you violently decommissioned it? Alice: What? Dilbert: Did you know it had subroutines for haunting, revenge, and being a jerk. Alice: What? Robot: We meet again.
Friday February 01,
2008
Tags cafe, change subject, date, dinner date, freinds, hobbies, internet, obscure articles, technology
Transcript
woman: do you have any hobbies?" Dilbert: I like to read obscure articles on the internet and image having friends who are interested in the same things. Woman: But you do have friends, right? Dilbert: Is it too late to change the subject?"
Friday March 07,
2008
Tags renounced addcition, internet, giving advice, wifi booster, signal booster, technology
Transcript
Ratbert: You'd be happier if you renounced your addiction to the internet and lived for the moment. Dilbert: Are you referring to the moment when there's a rat on my bed giving me bad advice? RatBert: How about now?" Dilbert: Perfect. Don't chew on the wi-fi signal booster.
Thursday March 27,
2008
Tags date, stories of woe, no tv or internet, carving canoe, woman runs out
Transcript
My cable system wasn't working last night. I didn't have TV or internet. Dilbert: So I stared at the wall until it was time for bed. I considered carving a canoe out of a tree trunk, but it seemed like a lot of work. Woman: Check!"
Thursday November 20,
2008
Tags computer, distraction, internet, productive, pictures of gadgets, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: I want to be productive, but the internet is calling to me. Computer: Hey, buddy. I've got pictures of gadgets. Dilbert: Cool ones? Computer: Sure, let's pretend that matters.
Friday November 21,
2008
Tags addicted to internet, doctor, interesting, internet, medicine, offcie, pill, underlying probelm, medical, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm addicted to the internet because it's more interesting than people. Is there a pill you can give to everyone else to make them more interesting? Doctors never want to treat the underlying problem.


