Less Micromangemt Comic Strips - Page 7
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259 Results for Less Micromangemt
View 61 - 70 results for less micromangemt comic strips. Discover the best "Less Micromangemt" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday March 18,
2008
Tags #pessimistic co workers, #crushed soul, #meat clothes, #rain soul, #less fortunate, #volunteering
Transcript
Dilbert: My pessimistic coworkers have crushed my soul. Now I am nothing but meat with clothes. Garbageman: You can regain your soul by volunteering to help the less fortunate. Dilbert: Who is less fortunate than me? Garbageman: Anyone you date."
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Thursday March 20,
2008
Tags #smart garbageman, #again soul, #someone less fortunate, #flowers on grave, #grave speaks
Transcript
Dilbert: The world's smartest garbage man says I need to help someone less fortunate to regain my soul. Ratbert: Don't look at me. I'm happier than a tickled clam. Dilbert: I brought you some flowers, dead person. Dead person: I don't need 'em I'm good."
Friday April 11,
2008
Tags #advice to intern, #don't finish on deadline, #freedom, #overworked, #less time, #nitpick
Transcript
wally: Heed my advice, young Asok. Only an idiot finishes a project before the deadline. The less time you give people to nitpick. The more time you have to pretend you are overworked." Freedom is just another word for people finding out you're useless.
Monday May 12,
2008
Tags #copy document, #less valuable, #copy boy
Transcript
The Boss: I need someone to make ten copies of this document. Asok: Is there any risk that performing this task will make me appear less valuable? The Boss: I need someone to tell copy boy to get to work. Asok: Erk o"
Wednesday June 04,
2008
Tags #class, #less useless, #carry coffee cups, #work faster, #two hands
Transcript
Wally says, "I took a class to learn how to be less useless." Wally says, "Now I carry twice as many coffee cups wherever I go." Carol says, "Does that make you work faster?" Wally says, "I only have two hands."
Thursday June 05,
2008
Tags #colossal waste, #different light, #less usless, #unimportant, #staff meetings
Transcript
Wally says, "I took a class on being less useless. Now I see the world in a different light." Wally says, "For example, I recognize these staff meetings as colossal wastes of time, but there's nothing I can do about them." Wally says, "Now my helplessness makes my uselessness seem unimportant."
Saturday July 12,
2008
Tags #masters degree, #business, #promoted to management, #less useful, #3 years, #night classes, #rock
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I'm thinking about getting a master's degree in business so I can get promoted to management." Dogbert says, "How long does it take to learn how to be less useful?" Dilbert says, "Three years of night classes." Dogbert says, "Hold still and I'll save you three years."
Saturday August 16,
2008
Tags #less air conditoning, #shorts allowed, #compensation, #upadte shorts wardrobe, #lederhosen
Transcript
The Boss says, "The company will be using less air conditioning to reduce expenses." The Boss says, "To compensate, we're loosening up on the dress code. Shorts will now be allowed." Wally says, "I'm not going to update my shorts wardrobe until I know this will last."
Tuesday December 16,
2008
Tags #office workers, #valuable, #value, #legacy system, #less valuable, #never appear less valuable, #dress code troll
Transcript
Dilbert: I worry that being assigned to work on the legacy systems will make me appear less valuable in the future. Catbert: You have my word that you could never appear less valuable than you are now. Gilbert: Why do your assurances make me feel worse? Catbert: Your new dress code is "troll."
Tuesday December 28,
2010
Tags #burden to people, #dutch sandwhich, #less appealing name, #tax attorneys, #transfer tax, #taxes
Transcript
Dogbert: I can lower your corporate taxes by using a strategy that tax attorneys call "the dutch sandwich" and Im not vice making that up. So...that would transfer our tax burden to people who can't afford tax attorneys. Dogbert: yeah....their sandwich has a less appealing name.