Listed Reasons Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

66 Results for Listed Reasons

View 61 - 66 results for listed reasons comic strips. Discover the best "Listed Reasons" comics from Dilbert.com.

Bad Analogies

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Bad Analogies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ideas, #criticism, #critique, #simile, #language

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Your idea is awful. Dilbert: Can you explain your reasons without using an absurd analogy? Man: It's like a pregnant squirrel eating a sandwich. Dilbert: I'll take that as a no.

View more books now

Wally's Best Play

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Best Play - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #excuses, #laziness, #work ethic, #deadline

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: There are many, many reasons why my project is late and over budget. Boss: Do any of those reasons not involve your incompetence and sloth? Wally: I think my best play here is to be offended by the question.

Ted Dies From Chair

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Dies From Chair - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #the boss, #ted, #treadmill, #alice, #exercise ball, #kneeling chair, #ergonomics

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Ted got thrown from his treadmill desk, bounced off of alice's exercise ball chair, and broke his neck on a kneeling chair. The cause of death is listed as, "good ergonomics." On the plus side, his posture was excellent.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #business, #office, #raise, #project

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i can't give you a raise because you did not complete your project. dilbert: that's because you canceled my project for budget reasons and assigned me to work on another project. the boss: did you finish your new project? dilbert: you only recently assigned it to me. the boss: apparently, i keep giving you work, but you never complete any of it. dilbert visually distressed: that is a total distortion of what happened! dilbert: i can't reward you for having good intentions and finishing nothing! dilbert: why not wait and see now i do on my current project? the boss: we don't need that anymore.

Hiring A Bad Analogy Guy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Hiring A Bad Analogy Guy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #office, #office workers, #questions, #sarcasm, #arrogance

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I hired a bad analogy guy. Instead of giving reasons for his opinions, he asks ridiculous questions while acting arrogant. Dilbert: That doesn't seem useful. Man: Would you say that about oxygen?

Lifestyle Disagreer

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Lifestyle Disagreer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #argument, #conversation, #office workers, #sarcasm, #disagreement, #attitude

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I hear what you're saying, and I disagree. Dilbert: Because...? Man: Because what? Dilbert: Do you have any reasons for your disagreement? Man: No, I'm a lifestyle disagreer. I disagree with everyone all the time. The reasons are irrelevant. Dilbert: You sound smart. Man: No. I'm not smart. Dilbert: And you're attractive too. Man: No. I'm ugl...okay, I see what you're doing.