Make Changes Comic Strips - Page 7
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1000 Results for Make Changes
View 61 - 70 results for make changes comic strips. Discover the best "Make Changes" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday February 17,
2000
Tags #talking to customore, #make up mind, #discontinue, #product, #fill a lull
Transcript
The Boss and Ted are walking together, carrying their briefcases. Ted says: "Let me do all the talking to the customer." The Boss replies: "Check!" The Boss, Ted, and the customer are sitting at a table. The Boss says to the customer: "You'd better make up your mind fast. We plan to discontinue that product any day." Walking back from the meeting, the Boss says to Ted, who is turned away from the Boss and looks angry, "Well, excuse me for trying to fill a lull in the conversation."
Saturday June 03,
2000
Tags #turn invisible, #run silent, #make descions, #can't see
Transcript
The Boss thinks to himself as Alice approaches, "If I could turn invisible, I wouldn't need to make decisions." The Boss continues to think, "Invisible...invisible...you can't see me." Alice says to the Boss, "I guess we're done." The Boss thinks to himself, "Run silent."
Saturday June 17,
2000
Tags #meeting, #strange words, #make sense, #pow, #buy card, #business
Transcript
Ted says to Dilbert and Wally, "Uh-oh...suddenly this meeting and all the strange words make sense." Wally's head explodes. Wally says to Dilbert, "It's your turn to buy the card."
Thursday September 21,
2000
Tags #current version, #making changes, #slap forehead, #test software, #major changes
Transcript
The Boss asks Dilbert, "Can you test the software today?" Dilbert answers, "No. I'm making major changes Tuesday." The Boss replies, "You could test the current version." Dilbert slaps his forehead exasperated at the Boss' response. The Boss looks at Dilbert and says to himself, "I wish people wouldn't slap their foreheads and say 'Aye-yi-yi-yi' every time I talk."
Sunday November 08,
1998
Tags #wally and boss, #no actual work, #excellent reviews, #make job helll, #moved cucbicle, #bathroom stall, #cubicle with door, #calls mother
Transcript
Wally sits in the Boss' office. The Boss says, "Wally, you haven't done any actual work in years, and yet we continue to pay you." Wally says, "Have I said thanks?" The Boss replies, "I'd fire you, but your performance reviews are all 'excellents." The Boss continues, "So, my plan is to make your job a living hell until you quit." Wally raises his fist and says, "You'll never win! My standards are lower than you can imagine!" The Boss says, "I'll start by moving you to a smaller cubicle." Wally crosses his arms and says, "Is that the best you got? Ha! Ha! Ha!" Wally is in a bathroom stall on the phone. He says, "Mom, guess who got an office with a door!"
Tuesday April 03,
2001
Tags #highest priority, #totally worthless, #empowered, #make decison, #double edged sword
Transcript
Looking at a piece of paper, Dilbert asks The Boss, "Which assignment is the highest priority?" Dilbert asks The Boss, "Is it the totally worthless one or the other totally worthless one?" Dilbert says, "I hope I'm empowered to make that decision." The Boss says, "Hope is a double-edged sword."
Monday June 11,
2001
Tags #expectations, #16 hours a aday, #make tired, #workers, #demands boss, #workers not listening
Transcript
The Boss announces, "I expect everyone to work sixteen hours a day." Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at the conference table. Dilbert says, "It seems like that would make us tired." Dilbert turns to Wally and asks, "Wouldn't that make you tired?" Wally replies, "I wasn't listening."
Tuesday June 12,
2001
Tags #leave work, #boss harrassment, #work is done, #make more, #exercise in fulity, #exercise is good
Transcript
Dilbert is walking out of the office with his briefcase and his jacket on. The Boss looks at his watch and says, "Leaving at seven?" Dilbert turns and replies, "All of my work is done." The Boss replies, "Then get some more work." Dilbert says, "That would make my life an exercise in futility." The Boss replies, "Exercise is good for you."
Tuesday July 24,
2001
Tags #evolution training, #make it thourgh, #banana, #peel, #gorillas, #neanderthal, #monkeys, #jungle naimals
Transcript
Headline: Evolution Training. Dogbert stands atop a stool in front of students with a pointer in his hand. He says, "Some of you will not make it through the class." A banana who happens to be seated next to a gorilla raises its hand and asks, "May I move to a different seat?" The rest of the class looks on. Dogbert responds, "Sure... Oops. Problem solved. Carl, don't leave that where someone will slip on it."
Saturday November 03,
2001
Tags #eliminate vacation days, #increase sick days, #make themselves sick, #evil, #hr
Transcript
Headline: Asok works in H.R. Catbert says to Asok, "If we eliminate vacation days and increase sick days..." Catbert continues, "Would the employees fall for our trap and make themselves sick to get days off?" Asok exclaims, "What?!!" Catbert says, "You're in H.R. now. It's okay to be evil." Asok replies, "Evil, right."