No Real Purpose Comic Strips - Page 7

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213 Results for No Real Purpose

View 61 - 70 results for no real purpose comic strips. Discover the best "No Real Purpose" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 08, 2002's comic on:


Tags #great vacation, #beautiful sunsets, #amazing food, #descriptions, #serve no purpose, #selfish attempt, #trigger memories

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Dilbert is sitting in his cubicle. A coworker approaches and says, "My vacation was great!" The coworker continues, "The sunsets were beautiful. The food was amazing." Dilbert turns and says, "Descriptions of your vacation serve no purpose." Dilbert continues, "I can neither see the sunsets nor taste the food." Dilbert continues, "It appears to be a selfish attempt to trigger happy memories for yourself at my expense.' The coworker responds, "Okay, buster! When my seven rolls of film get developed.." She exclaims, "You're out of the loop!!!" The coworker leaves and Dilbert whistles and thinks to himself, "That worked out better than I hoped."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 30, 2013's comic on:


Tags #discussion, #how-to, #obstinacy, #rules of leadership, #context, #books, #different approach, #real leaders, #magic formula, #gullible baboon, #throughout history, #random book, #Entertainment

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Boss: I'm reading a great management book about the rules of leadership. Dilbert: Allow me to put that in context. There are probably 10,000 books about leadership, and each one has a different approach. And there are millions of real leaders, of which no two are alike. Moreover, every situation is unique and requires a different type of leader. And yet this one author has found a magic formula to transform you from a gullible baboon into a great leader. And that makes sense because all great leaders throughout history achieved success by reading a random book. Boss: I don't like context. Dilbert: It isn't popular.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 20, 2013's comic on:


Tags #deception, #managers & supervisors, #company policy, #rate staff, #no upper body strength, #real reason, #business

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Boss: Company policy says I have to rate one-third of my staff as "Does not meet expectations." I chose the two of you because you have no upper body strength. This way it's safer if you go berzerk. I thought you said I should tell them the reason I picked them. Catbert: Not the real reason.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 2013's comic on:


Tags #cosmetics, #relations between the sexes, #awful smell, #new fragrance, #pepper spray, #half gym sock, #dual purpose, #odiferous moat, #weaker applicants, #tweak

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Dilbert: What's that awful smell? Wally: My new fragrance. It's half pepper spray and half gym sock. It has a dual purpose. The pepper spray is so I can build up an immunity to it. Dilbert: That'll probably come in handy someday. Wally: Right? The second purpose is to crate an odiferous moat around me to discourage the weaker romantic applicants. Carol: Unh!!! Wally: I might need to tweak the formula.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 20, 2014's comic on:


Tags #new idea, #dream, #3d glasses, #for real life, #people love 3d, #not movies, #obvious, #ideas

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CEO: Last night, an idea for a new product came to me in a dream. Dilbert: ICK CEO: 3-D Glasses. Dilbert: To watch movies? CEO: No, real life. Dilbert: So...The glasses would make life in general appear three-dimensional? CEO: Exactly! People Love 3-D Stuff. Dilbert: Im not going to respond to your idea. Im just going to sit here looking three-dimensional. CEO: wait....how are you doing that? Dilbert: Im wearing glasses that make me look 3-D

Dogbert's Pep Talk

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Dogbert's Pep Talk - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 15, 2018's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #virtual, #forget, #real, #people, #inadequate, #talk

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Dilbert: I'm worried that if I spend too much time using virtual reality, I'll forget how to talk to real people. Dogbert: I doubt you could get more boring and inadequate than you already are.

Parody Or Real

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Parody Or Real - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #joke, #sarcasm, #technology, #boss, #business, #department, #proposal, #reality, #parody, #inversion

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dilbert: ever since the parody inversion, no one can tell the difference between jokes and reality boss: i need you to get buy-in on this proposal from all thirteen department heads by tomorrow wally: was that real or parody? dilbert: i think they're the same now

Your Real Scheme

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Your Real Scheme - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 2019's comic on:


Tags #office workers, #office, #business, #scheme, #power, #costs, #mind, #reader, #psychology

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dilbert: and this method will reduce costs by thirty percent. ted: nice try, but i know your real scheme is to grab power. dilbert: you're not a good mind reader ted: and yet i knew you would say i can't read minds, explain that

Real Data

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Real Data  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 15, 2020's comic on:


Tags #decision, #office workers, #sarcasm, #dumb, #facts

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Man: We need to make decisions based on real data! Dilbert: Who do you imagine disagrees with that obvious statement? Man: Uh-oh. I just realized I'm dumb and never knew it. Dilbert: I hear it can sneak up on you.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 2011's comic on:


Tags #fake press relases, #new green technology, #scientist, #2040 power home, #refrigerator door, #science

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Dogbert says, "I'm writing fake press releases for imaginary new green energy technologies." Computer says, "Scientists say that by 2040 you will be able to power your entire home with the breeze from your refrigerator door." Dilbert says, "Now how will I know which green breakthroughs are real?" Dogbert says, "Seriously? You think there are real ones?"