No Tail Comic Strips - Page 7
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64 Results for No Tail
View 61 - 64 results for no tail comic strips. Discover the best "No Tail" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday January 20,
2008
Tags #human resources, #hr person, #evil director, #bad attitude, #project, #corpse of misery, #donated brain, #gum museum, #mental imbalance, #clarity, #irrational, #employee moral festival, #won meeting, #business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert: Your boss says you have a bad attitude. Dilbert: That's because my project is a flailing corpse of misery, and my boss donated his brain to a gum museum. If I had a good attitude in this situation, it would be a sign of a mental imbalance. My bad attitude is proof that I am thinking clearly. Are you going to compliment me on my clarity or demand I be irrational? CatBert: I'm putting you in charge of the employee morale festival. Dilbert: I have a sudden urge to grab you by the tail and beat myself to death. Catbert: That's how I know I won the meeting.
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Tuesday June 03,
2014
Tags #disciplines, #horns, #injected, #magic, #spell remover, #tail, #work ethic, #performance enhancing, #drugs, #boss injected
Transcript
Dilbert: Our boss injected me with job performance enhancing drugs. Wally: Job performance be gone! Apparently, I can do that now. Asok: I must find more disciples.
Tuesday January 10,
2017
Ted Is Doing A Terrible Job
Tags #talking, #conversation, #boring, #annoy, #quitting, #boredom
Transcript
Boss: Ted is doing a terrible job. Catbert: Maybe you should talk to him. Boss: What should I say? Catbert: It doesn't matter. Five minutes of listening to you will make him want to quit. Boss: That's crazy enough to work. Catbert: You've only been here for two minutes and my tail is asleep.
Saturday December 29,
2018
Alice Gets Mandatory Training
Tags #complaining, #office workers, #punishment, #threat
Transcript
Alice: I can't work with old Ned. He's a sexist, racist, bigoted troglodyte. Catbert: Name-calling is not allowed in this company. I sentence you to three weeks of mandatory training. Alice: I could trangle you with your own tail. Catbert: Six weeks!