Online Stalking Victim Comic Strips - Page 7

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View 61 - 70 results for online stalking victim comic strips. Discover the best "Online Stalking Victim" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ethics course, #on line course, #perfect scores, #taking for boss

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What?! You only got a 'B' taking the online ethics course for me? "No one will believe you're me unless you get all perfect scores." "I...was...tired." "Why? You only did 300 push-ups for my online gym class!!!"

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Unemployed "No problem. I'll just go online and find a great job." "Let's see...This one looks good. 'No experience needed..." "...Must be willing to relocate, then be put into a huge blender and packed as a condiment.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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You said I'd never find an online date because I'm unemployed. But you were wrong! "Have you seen her picture?" "Yes! She looks hot." "Do you have 'Photoshop' software?" "Maybe."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elections, #online (web) news, #patents, #libor rates, #higgs bison, #patent law, #electoral college

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Boss: Here's some news I don't understand about libor rates. Here's some news I don't understand about the Higgs boson. Remind me why we have news. Catbert: I think it has something to do with patent law and the electoral college.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #Games, #aggressive recently, #testosterone, #trivia contest, #useless worm

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Dilbert: I've been aggressive recently. Wally: I haven't noticed. Dilbert: I think my testosterone is all jacked up because I won the company's online trivia contest. Not get out of my way, useless worm. Wally: Okay, I'm starting to see it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cannibals, #victims, #staving competition, #cannibalizing

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Dilbert: Our new product is cannibalizing our old product. Either we have a brilliant strategy for staving off competition, or our CEO is the victim of a bully. Bully: Ha ha! Why don't you stop cannibalizing yourself?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #etiquette & ethics, #telepresnece, #carbon based units, #on line, #third stall, #mens room, #etiquette

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Robot: I told Wally he could use my body for telepresence. He's coming online now. Wally: Greetings, carbon-based units. I come to you from the third stall in the men's room. Boss: This is what happens when our techhnology evolves faster than our etiquette.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #traffic, #work, #co worker, #shopping, #week, #attractive nuisance

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secretary: Wally, did you finish the traffic estimates?" Wally: I didn't have time. I spent all week shopping on the company's online supply ordering site. Hey, you can't blame the guy who just uses the attractive nuisance.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #breaks down, #cries, #date, #endless stories, #huge defects, #restaurant, #series of stoires, #soul crushed

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Dilbert: I look different from my online picture because it was taken before my coworkers crushed my soul. Would you like to hear an endless series of stories about a coworker you don't know?" Date: okay. Dilbert: Really? Gee, you must have some huge defects of your own. Date: I don't deserve to be happy!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #therapy, #addiction, #job posting, #dung beetlke, #epileptic cow, #disturbing imagery, #couch, #shrink, #current job, #unsatifying, #psychology

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A woman says, "How long have you been addicted to ogling online job postings?" Alice says, "It started when I realized my current job is like a dung beetle trying to mate with an epileptic cow." The woman says, "That imagery is disturbing." Alice says, "I know, right?"