Poor Notes Comic Strips - Page 7

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136 Results for Poor Notes

View 61 - 70 results for poor notes comic strips. Discover the best "Poor Notes" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 1992's comic on:


Tags #christmas presents, #Dilbert, #Wally, #christmas, #gift, #cd player, #Card, #shallow, #gesture

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Wally enters holding an envelope and says, "I'm collecting money for a gift to a poor family this Christmas." Dilbert opens his wallet and asks, "What are you buying them?" Wally replies, "A CD player." Dilbert says, "Thank you for making this the most shallow gesture of my life." Wally says, "I'll add your name to the card."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #ratbert, #office, #computer, #video games

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Dilbert sits at his desk staring at his computer. He has dishes stacked on top of his head. Ratbert asks Dogbert, "What are those dishes doing on Dilbert's head?" Dogbert replies, "He's in a video game trance. I'm testing my theory that he is unaware of his environment and has no discernible mental activity." Ratbert walks away with dishes stacked on his head. Ratbert thinks, "Poor guy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #executive man, #business meeting, #assistants

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An executive says, "The motion is approved. Dogbert is our new company president because he has the best hair." Dogbert says to a man who follows him taking notes, ". . . Bulldoze the employee cafeteria and put in my helicopter pad . . . And I need a few office improvements . . ." Dogbert points to the floor in front of his desk and says to the assistant, "We need a trap door here, but it won't be funny unless you can give me some 'flushing' sounds."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 26, 1994's comic on:


Tags #planning to focus, #products killing people, #steal office supplies, #studies are flawed, #urban areas, #advertising

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"Dogbert: Ethics Advisor" "We know our products are killing people, but we're claiming the studies are flawed." "We're planning to focus our advertising on the youth markets in poor urban areas." "So, given all that, is it okay for me to steal office supplies?" "I'd have to say yes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 1995's comic on:


Tags #dogberts talk radio, #smartest creature, #dolts, #taking calls, #understand complex, #crossfire

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Dogbert sits in a radio DJ booth wearing earphones and speaking into a microphone. He says, "I'm the smartest creature in the universe and you are all dolts." Dogbert continues, "Today I'm taking calls from people who think they understand complex issues because they watch 'Crossfire' on CNN." A caller says, ". . . So why not put all poor people in orphanages?" With his paw on the control panel, Dogbert says, "Put your head up to the speaker, Bob."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 1990's comic on:


Tags #hairballs, #dust, #bunny, #cultural, #home, #hide, #clumps, #under, #furniture, #nip, #bud

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A large rabbit taps Dogbert on the back. Dogbert turns around and shouts, "Holy hairballs! What are you?!!" The bunny replies, "I am the 'Dust Bunny,' an emerging cultural icon." The bunny explains, "Once a year I come to every home and hide clumps of dust under furniture and major appliances." The dust bunny says, "You must honor me by decorating closet doors and singing dust hymns." Dogbert asks, "What about gifts? Do I get any gifts out of this?" The dust bunny replies, "No. The dust bunny symbolizes only love, goodwill and very poor housekeeping." Dogbert sucks up the dust bunny with a vacuum cleaner. He looks at the reader and says, "I know, it seems harsh, but you have to nip these things in the bud." The dust bunny cries from inside the vacuum, "Okay, gifts!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 19, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #asteroid, #Dogbert, #death, #space, #evil, #golf ball, #dooms day

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Dilbert stands at a desk and Dogbert sits next to a telescope. Dilbert says, "According to my calculations, the asteroid 'Sagnorpt' will collide with earth in 2.3 minutes." Dogbert covers his eyes and screams, "We're all gonna die!" Dogbert hugs Dilbert's legs and shouts, "I'm sorry about all of those bad things I've done to you!" Dogbert cries, "I renounce my evil ways! I dedicate the remaining minute of my life to the poor!!" Dogbert says, "Waitta minute . . . Why aren't you groveling for salvation?" Dilbert replies, "The asteroid is only the size of a golf ball." There's a large crash. Dilbert lies on the floor after the asteroid hits him on the head. Dogbert says, "I probably shouldn't try to read too much into this."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 1996's comic on:


Tags #experiment 1, #exposing rat marketing plan, #no adverse response, #introduction, #background, #far more exposure, #humans, #tolerate

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The caption says, "Experiment #1: I am exposing a rat to my company's marketing plan." Dilbert shows a copy of the plan to Ratbert. The caption says, "He seems to have no adverse response to the introduction and background." Ratbert hums as he reads the plan. Dilbert takes notes. The caption says, "This is already far more exposure than humans could tolerate." A large bump appears on Ratbert's head and he says, "Sales projections . . . brain tumor . . . get Tylenol . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 26, 1996's comic on:


Tags #dogcart institure, #advanced thinking, #ending pverty, #televison, #wretched lives, #paid guests, #straggler cops

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Dogbert stands on a desk chair and tells Dilbert, "Here in the 'Dogbert Institute for Advanced Thinking,' I have devised a plan for ending poverty." Dogbert continues, "My plan is to wait until there are so many talk shows on television that all the people with wretched lives can be paid guests." Dilbert asks, "What about the poor people who don't want to be on talk shows?" Dogbert replies, "We'll get the stragglers on 'Cops.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 26, 1996's comic on:


Tags #yelling, #boss, #diagree, #oor interpersonal skills, #class, #improve them, #snarky remarks, #Dilbert, #boss projects

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The Boss sits at his desk and tells Dilbert, "Whenever we disagree, I always end up yelling." The Boss continues, "That's an indication that you have poor interpersonal skills. I'm sending you to a class to improve them." Dilbert says, "It looks like you've gained weight. Would it help if I started jogging?" The Boss replies, "This is exactly what I'm talking about."