Projections Come From Comic Strips - Page 7
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329 Results for Projections Come From
View 61 - 70 results for projections come from comic strips. Discover the best "Projections Come From" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday April 09,
1992
Tags man, robe, marketing, research, new, friday, shout, question
Transcript
A man in a robe points to a well and says to Dilbert, "When you work in marketing, you use the research well to test new ideas." The man continues, "Any day but Friday you can shout your question into the well and an answer will come back." Dilbert asks, "Why not Friday?" Someone inside the well replies, "Friday is your day in the well."
Monday July 06,
1992
Tags friendship, strategy, Dogbert, financial, advisor, live, lifelong, bond, trust, money, churn
Transcript
Dogbert answers the door and a man in a suit says, "Hi! I want to be your financial advisor." The man continues, "I've come to live with you. We'll eventually form a lifelong bond of trust and friendship." Dogbert says angrily, "I liked better when you guys just took our money." The man says, "I recommend a strategy called 'Churn.'"
Saturday August 22,
1992
Tags Dilbert, bills', big, egg-shaped, men's fashion, clothes, statement, sweater, brown
Transcript
Dilbert walks into "Bill's Big 'N' Egg-Shaped Men's Fashions." A sign in the window says, "Specializing in the ovoid man." Dilbert says to the salesclerk, "I want to some clothes that make a statement." The clerk responds, "All our clothes make a statement." The salesperson hands Dilbert a sweater and says, "This sweater says 'Help me, help me, I look like a big egg!'" Dilbert asks, "Does it come in brown?"
Monday October 05,
1992
Tags Dogbert, deep, sleep, hypnosis, Draw, aliens, abducted, e.t., bag, packed, Dilbert
Transcript
Dogbert sits on a chair and Dilbert lies on a couch. Dogbert says, "You are in a deep sleep . . . Now, while under hypnosis you can draw the aliens who abducted you." Dogbert whispers, "Hint: they all look exactly like 'E.T.'" No longer hypnotized, Dilbert looks at a drawing and says, "Wow! I drew that??" Dogbert says, "They usually come back for you. Better keep a bag packed."
Tuesday February 02,
1993
Tags Dilbert, computer, programmer, supervisor, mastering, instruction, manual, pants, tim
Transcript
Peter says to Dilbert and a woman, "Yesterday I was a computer programmer and today I'm your new supervisor." Peter tugs at his pants and says, "The hardest part is mastering these dang management clothes. Did you know they don't come with an instruction manual?" Peter's pants fall to his ankles and he says, "I'll have to call their '800' help line again."
Monday February 22,
1993
Tags Dogbert, ratbert, quickly, hole, space, fabric, inside, incredibly, dangerous
Transcript
Dogbert and Ratbert sit on the hassock watching television. Dilbert yells from another room, "Dogbert! Ratbert! Come quickly, I found a hole in the fabric of space!" Dilbert, Dogbert and Ratbert look at a small hole. Dilbert says, "We must look inside, but it's too incredibly dangerous." Dogbert kicks Ratbert into the hole and Dilbert says, "Thanks." Dogbert replies, "No problem."
Wednesday April 14,
1993
Tags Dilbert, alice, Wally, testosterone, spewing, pickup truck, rifle, hunt, work, pigeons, truck
Transcript
Dilbert says to Wally, who has his arm around a woman, "Gee, Wally, you sure have been popular with women since the testosterone started spewing from your head." Drops of liquid come from Wally's head. Wally replies, "It's amazing . . . I even bought a pickup truck and a rifle so I can hunt after work." Dilbert asks, "What do you hunt around here?" Wally replies, "Pigeons are the most convenient . . . Don't even have to get out of the truck."
Tuesday June 15,
1993
Tags Dilbert, the boss, brochure, seminar, management, zombies, utilize, paradigm, vertical, empowerment, proactive
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "I got a brochure for 'Dogbert's Seminar on Management Zombies.' I think you should go." Dilbert reads the pamphlet, "Learn how to use words like: utilize, paradigm, vertical, empowerment, and proactive in every sentence." Dilbert says, "I'm not sure I want to talk like that." The Boss says, "Come . . . Join us . . . Don't be afraid . . ."
Wednesday June 16,
1993
Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, management, seminar, optimistic, creative, individuals, jargon-spewing, corporate, zombies, donut
Transcript
Dogbert points to a picture of a man with a lightbulb over his head. Dogbert says, "Many of you come to my management seminar as optimistic, creative, clear-speaking individuals." Dogbert continues, "But with hard work, you can become jargon-spewing corporate zombies, like Carl here." Dilbert sits in the audience. Carl sits in a chair looking straight ahead and saying, "I want to dialogue with you about utilizing resources." Dogbert says, "Good boy! Here's a donut." Dogbert tosses him a donut.
Monday June 28,
1993
Tags Dilbert, alice, Wally, patent, scent
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dilbert thinks, "My patent application is complete. Soon the other engineers will come sniffing around." Dilbert thinks, "They are attracted by the scent of success. They want their names on my patent." Wally, Alice and Ted peer into Dilbert's cubicle. Alice says to Wally and Ted, "The scent CAN'T be coming from here." Ted says, "We may be getting a false positive from his baloney sandwich." They all sniff the air.