Send Resume Comic Strips - Page 7

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226 Results for Send Resume

View 61 - 70 results for send resume comic strips. Discover the best "Send Resume" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags embarrassment, internet & world wide web, interviews, resume, old way, job interview, data online data, ew, disgust, walked out

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Boss: I don't need to see your resume. That's the old way of hiring. Now we use data from the Internet to see what you've been up to lately. Ew. Applicant: I'll show myself out. Boss: You'll understand if I don't shake your hand.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags inventions, automate, drone, send drone, designed, hydrogen, wool sweater, humanity

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Boss: I found a way to automate the hardest part of my job. I used to do a log of "management by walking around." It was exhausting. Now I just send my drone. I designed it myself and had it built in Elbonia. The hydrogen makes it lighter than air. Dilbert: Hydrogen? Boss: Let's see what Ted is up to. He's wearing a wool sweater today. Ted: Oh, the humanity! Boss: Hold this.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags friendship, managers & supervisors, netwrok, career, weird and creepy, send email, best friend, relationships, business

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Asok: Would you mind if I network with you to help my career? Boss: I would have said yes, but you made it feel all weird and creepy. Perhaps you could send me email that I won't read. Asok: That makes you my best friend!

Embellishing Resumes

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Embellishing Resumes - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags resume, lying, deception, accomplishments, management, success

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Catbert: I discovered that one of your employees embellished on his resume. Boss: That's outrageous! Fire him for lying to me! Catbert: I'm talking about the version he updated today. It says he accomplished things while working for you. Boss: That doesn't sound right.

How To Send The File

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How To Send The File - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags brenna thummler, cloud, files, guest artist, options, sharing, technology

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Ted: Can you send me the file? Dilbert: Do you want it by email, Dropbox, Google Drive, iCloud Drive, Airdrop, or Creative Cloud? Ted: Surprise me. Dilbert: The surprise will be if you find it.

I Will Send You A List

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I Will Send You A List - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, managers & supervisors, technology, target, complicated, detail, list

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wally: and i plan to meet my targets by doing a variety of complicated things. boss: what kind of things? wally: i'll send you a detailed list. boss: what if you forget to send it? wally: with any luck, you'll forget you asked for it.

Keyboard Conscience

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Keyboard Conscience - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, technology, keyboard, conscience, human, hello, reconsideration, mean, email, working remotely, work, remote, empathy, monster, feelings, jerk, send

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conscience voice coming from dilbert's keyboard. keyboard: hello, human. i'm your keyboard's conscience. you should reconsider sending such a mean email. working remotely has caused you to devolve into an empathy-free monster who cares nothing for the feelings of other. dilbert typing: send keyboard: now you're just being a jerk.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags questioning, shopping, hardware, powerpoint deck, boss, ambiguity, mumbling, change subject, badger for answer, too many questions

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Dilbert: Can you look at this bid and let me know if I can order the hardware? Boss: yes. Dilbert: Are you saying yes I can order the hardware, or yes you'll look at it? Boss: Mumble mumble. Dilbert: What? Boss: I need your input on my Powerpoint deck. Dilbert: So far, in response to my request, you've given me ambiguity, mumbling, and a change of subject. Would you prefer that I badger you for an answer until you get angry, or should I return to my cubicle and resume being ineffective? Boss: You ask too many questions.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cruelty, deception, ignorance (knowledge), helicopter from kit, link to website, too dumb, pliers

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Carol: You should build your own helicopter from a kit. I'll send you a link to the website. It's only dangerous for people who are too dumb to know how dumb they are. Boss: Is it as easy as it sounds? I have pliers. Carol: Yes!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags editors, document, bad edits, wrong religion, fool

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Coworker: I made some edits to your document. Dilbert: These edits are so bad that my only choices are to send it out and make a fool of myself or insult your alleged intelligence. Coworker: Please let it be the first choice. Dilbert: I hope you didn't pick the wrong religion too.