Sign Papers Comic Strips - Page 7

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

209 Results for Sign Papers

View 61 - 70 results for sign papers comic strips. Discover the best "Sign Papers" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #jail, #rich, #famous, #record, #stole, #investors, #learned, #lesson, #term, #over

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert stands in the door under a sign that says, "Dogbert's Jail for the Rich and Famous." A man carrying a briefcase says, "Checking in." Dogbert sits at a desk reading a document and the man sits across from him. Dogbert says, "Your record says you stole three billion dollars from investors." The man laughs. Dogbert continues, "I guess you've learned your lesson." The man looks at his watch and says, "Whoa! Looks like my jail term is almost over!"

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #robots, #requires, #vast, #strength, #protect, #harm, #humans, #robot, #code

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a robot, "Remember, the 'Robot's Code' requires you to use your vast strength to serve, protect, and never harm humans." The robot says, "Ha! I didn't sign any 'Robot's Code.' In fact, with my vast strength I can make YOU serve ME!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I forgot to program in the 'Robot's Code.'" The robot reaches toward Dilbert's head and says, "Maybe I'll crush your head just for fun!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #potational, #assignment, #the boss, #notice, #market, #two, #drink, #minimum

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "Dilbert, I'm putting you on a rotational assignment . . ." The Boss continues, "You will be working in marketing until further notice." Dilbert arrives at the entrance to marketing. A sign over the door says, "Two drink minimum." Everyone inside is wearing a robe and holding a drink.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #marriage counselor, #plastic surgery, #personalities, #bad, #pretend, #other, #communicate, #begging, #trouble

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at a desk in front of a sign that says, "Marriage Counselor." A man and a woman sit across from him. Dogbert continues, "I recommend massive plastic surgery for both of you . . . And your personalities are bad, too; pretend to be other people." The man or the woman asks, "Should we try to communicate more?" Dogbert replies, "No, that's just begging for trouble."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #bills', #big, #egg-shaped, #men's fashion, #clothes, #statement, #sweater, #brown

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert walks into "Bill's Big 'N' Egg-Shaped Men's Fashions." A sign in the window says, "Specializing in the ovoid man." Dilbert says to the salesclerk, "I want to some clothes that make a statement." The clerk responds, "All our clothes make a statement." The salesperson hands Dilbert a sweater and says, "This sweater says 'Help me, help me, I look like a big egg!'" Dilbert asks, "Does it come in brown?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #dating, #service, #deep, #down, #fantasy, #woman, #modelled, #brochure, #francis, #kris

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at a desk under a sign that says, "Dogbert's Dating Service." A man says, "I'd like to sign up." The customer continues, "Although deep down I know that all of the people in your service are men, I cling to the fantasy of meeting the woman who modeled for your brochure." Dogbert says, "She's taken, but I can match you with somebody named 'Francis' or 'Kris.'" The man replies, "There's hope!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failed, #driving, #test, #nine, #Dogbert, #school, #specialize, #problem, #application, #form, #special, #pointy

View Transcript

Transcript

A customer sits across from Dogbert's desk. The boy says, "I've failed the driving test nine times. Can you help?" Dogbert replies, "I specialize in the problem cases. Just sign the application form." The boy looks at the pencil and says, "Wait . . . I've seen one of these before. Yes, there's something special about the pointy end . . . But what?" Dogbert thinks, "Uh oh."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #little, #doggie, #dude, #Dogbert, #driving, #school, #gruesome, #highway, #accidents, #intended, #helicopter

View Transcript

Transcript

A boy wearing a cap stands in front of Dogbert's desk and says, "Sign me up, little doggie-dude." Dogbert says, "We'll begin with a film about gruesome highway accidents. It is intended to shock you into driving safely." The boy sits in front of a television eating a snack. The boy asks, "Really? People get shocked by THIS?" Dogbert says, "I'll be following your car in a helicopter."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #driving school, #student, #driver, #stereo, #signal, #car, #phone, #defrost, #window, #fishing, #driving, #simulator, #test, #drive

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and a boy sit in a car with a "Student Driver" sign on the roof. Dogbert says, "With your right hand, insert a CD into the stereo . . . Good." Dogbert continues, "Now signal left! Answer the car phone! Defrost the rear window! Honk is you love fishing!" The student panics and tosses the phone into the air. Dogbert says, "Fortunately, we're only in the driving simulator." The car is sitting in a dealership showroom. A salesman approaches the car and asks, "Do you boys want to take it for a test drive?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #laugh, #science, #surprise, #united, #nations, #vote, #space, #alien, #ruler of earth, #supreme, #freckles, #press conference

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair watching television. A newscaster says, "In a surprise decision, the United Nations voted to make Dogbert - the Space Alien - the Supreme Ruler of Earth." The newscaster continues, "More on that later. But first, science offers new hope for people with freckles . . ." The caption says, "Dogbert holds his first press conference." Dogbert stands at a podium shouting, "Hu-ha-ha! Hu-ha-ha!" A reporter thinks, "Not a good sign."