Sing Or Dance Comic Strips - Page 7

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71 Results for Sing Or Dance

View 61 - 70 results for sing or dance comic strips. Discover the best "Sing Or Dance" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 10, 2013's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #fired, #programming code, #undocumented, #passwords, #death spiral, #huge raise

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Boss: Wally, you have accomplished none of your goals. I have to let you go. Wally: Actually, I accomplished a lot. I spent the past ten years creating a tangle of undocumented programming code. Every one of our major systems is linked to it. If I don't enter a password every day, the entire company will go into a technology death spiral. If you value your job, you'll give me a huge raise and dance on this table like a monkey!!! Boss: Let's call it a tie. Wally: Yeah, I'm good with that.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 25, 2010's comic on:


Tags #volunteer, #project, #not enough resources, #flunky, #scared, #sucky, #laugh, #smile, #puppet boy, #dance, #happy

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Alice says, "Guess what, Ted? I volunteered to run a critical project while knowing I don't have enough resources." Alice says, "When it becomes a crisis, I will delcare martial law and order you to become my flunky." Alice says, "In your face, puppet boy!" Ted says, "This day is turning out to be a little extra sucky."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 30, 2010's comic on:


Tags #new job, #internal, #human resources, #celebrate, #dance, #eyes closed, #mouth open, #double, #business

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Catbert says, "Good news, Alice. You got the internal job you posted for." Alice says, "YES!!!" Catbert says, "You'll need to keep doing your old job too." Alice says, "Did you just make me celebrate a doubling of my workload?" Catbert says, "Thank you for acknowledging my awesomeness."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 29, 2010's comic on:


Tags #intern, #promote, #excited, #dance, #annoyed, #arrogant, #limbo, #exist

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The Boss says, "Asok, you've been such a good intern that I've decided to promote you." The Boss says, "Your new status is called limbo. You will exist in a plane between the living and the damned." Asok says, "Yes!!! I will exist!" The Boss says, "Great. It went right to his head."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2008's comic on:


Tags #eliminate bonuses, #savings used, #fun loving executives, #wear festive costumes, #sound of no money, #ceo's yacht, #whale oil, #bring harpoon, #happy about underpay

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The Boss says, "Our CEO decided to eliminated employee bonuses." The Boss says, "The savings will be used to produce an in-house movie to inspire you." Dilbert says, "Inspire us to do what?" The Boss says, "For starters, we'd like you to be happy about being underpaid." The Boss says, "Our fun-loving executives will wear festive costumes and sing about the virtues of poverty." The Boss says, "The movie is called 'The Sounds of No Money.'" The Boss says, "The premiere is on our CEO's yacht. He wants all of you to be there." Asok says, "We're invited to his yacht?" The Boss says, "The yacht runs on whale oil, so bring a harpoon."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 2009's comic on:


Tags #rude, #explaining, #annoyed, #dancing, #angry, #uncaring

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Dilbert says, "My insolence safety zone has expanded." The boss says, "Your what?" Dilbert says, "It's a measure of how rude I can be without fear of consequences." Dilbert says, "You have no budget to give me a raise, so I have no potential gain from acting professionally." Dilbert says, "And it would be inconvinient for you to fire a highly experienced engineer and try to bring a new one up to speed." Dilbert says, "So from now on, when you ask me to do something stupid, which is most of the time..." Dilbert says, "I'll roll my eyes, make a dismissive grunt and do this dance." Phhhht! Dilbert says, "Hey walla-walla walla! Boopita boopita boopita!" Dilbert says, "You finally raised my morale. Good work on that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2003's comic on:


Tags #hired wife, #mean, #condescending, #slave driver, #obnoxious

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The Boss: "I hired my wife to be our new receptionist." Boss: "I foresee no problems whatsoever." Wife: "Hey, Dipweed!" "Go buy me a bagel and a cappuccino." "Then wash my car and fill the gas tank." "NOW DANCE FOR ME, LITTLE MAN! HA HA! DANCE OR I'LL HAVE YOU FIRED!!!" "How may I help you? Have a nice day!" The boss: "Stop dancing in the lobby. My wife is trying to work."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 2002's comic on:


Tags #50 management, #interpretor, #jargin, #languages, #mumble, #mumble mumble, #pointy haired dialct

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "...And the most critical part of your objective is..." All that comes from The Boss' mouth is, "Mumble, mumble, mumble." Dilbert turns and asks, "What?" The Boss continues, "Mumble, mumble, mumble." Dilbert gets up and says, "I'll be right back. I need an interpreter who speaks mumble." Dilbert comes back with a coworker, whom he introduces to The Boss. Dilbert says, "This is Allen. He speaks fifty management languages including jargon, weaselease and mumble." The Boss turns to Allen and says, "Mumble, mumble, mumble." Allen replies, "Mumble, mumble, mumble." Allen reports to Dilbert, "I'm a bit rusty with the pointy-haired dialect but I think he wants you to line dance in a gazebo."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 01, 2002's comic on:


Tags #research expense, #highly trained engineer, #not a clerk, #employee, #trivial task, #project cancelled, #assignment, #kudos award

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The Boss enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Dilbert, research this expense and find out what it's for." Dilbert looks at the paper and says, "It's only $2.37." Dilbert exclaims, "It could take all day to track down!" Dilbert continues, "I'm a highly trained engineer, not a clerk." Dilbert crumples up the paper and exclaims, "How can you justify wasting a valuable employee like me on a trivial task like this?!!" The Boss responds, "That reminds me: your project got canceled. This is your only assignment." The Boss does a dance and exclaims, "Woo-hoo! In your face!!!" As The Boss walks away, he thinks, "I wonder if he'll find out I spent $2.37 on his "kudos" award."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 02, 2015's comic on:


Tags #martial arts, #self defense, #robber, #mugging, #mugger, #yoga, #dance, #fight, #beaten, #fists, #hit

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Thief: Hey! Give me your wallet. Boss: I must warn you that I am skilled in the arts of yoga, feng shui, and Irish dancing. Dilbert: But it wasn't enough? Boss: He did a fist thing.