Stir With Finger Comic Strips - Page 7
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1000 Results for Stir With Finger
View 61 - 70 results for stir with finger comic strips. Discover the best "Stir With Finger" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday November 20,
2000
Tags #internet music, #free, #digital tops, #here with engineers, #ideas, #applied to others
Transcript
Wally says to Alice and Dilbert, "All music on the internet should be free. Artists could make money from digital tips." Catbert says to Wally, "Great idea. We'll do the same thing here with the engineers." Wally says to Dilbert, "Have you ever noticed that my ideas are only brilliant when applied to other people?"
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday December 16,
2000
Tags #questions, #ever alone, #with people
Transcript
Dilbert, pointing to a diagram, asks, "Are there any questions?" Three co-workers sit at a table looking stupefied. There is a paper airplane and a cup that's been knocked over spilling some liquid on the table. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Do you ever feel alone when you're with people?" Dogbert, reading and not looking up, says, "I try to."
Tuesday December 26,
2000
Tags #rifle though pockets, #meditate, #mixed with management
Transcript
A doctor is examining The Boss as Dilbert says, "I think he tried to meditate." The doctor says, "That's the problem." The doctor continues examining The Boss and says to Dilbert, "You shouldn't mix meditation with management. The mind gets too empty." Dilbert asks, "What can we do?" The doctor says, "I plan to rifle through his pockets."
Sunday November 08,
1998
Tags #wally and boss, #no actual work, #excellent reviews, #make job helll, #moved cucbicle, #bathroom stall, #cubicle with door, #calls mother
Transcript
Wally sits in the Boss' office. The Boss says, "Wally, you haven't done any actual work in years, and yet we continue to pay you." Wally says, "Have I said thanks?" The Boss replies, "I'd fire you, but your performance reviews are all 'excellents." The Boss continues, "So, my plan is to make your job a living hell until you quit." Wally raises his fist and says, "You'll never win! My standards are lower than you can imagine!" The Boss says, "I'll start by moving you to a smaller cubicle." Wally crosses his arms and says, "Is that the best you got? Ha! Ha! Ha!" Wally is in a bathroom stall on the phone. He says, "Mom, guess who got an office with a door!"
Monday January 22,
2001
Tags #mordac, #monitor, #pc arrived, #weak memories, #cheese with whine, #memorizing calendar
Transcript
Asok the Intern says to Mordac, "Um... Mordac, my new PC arrived without a monitor." Mordac says to Asok, "Bah! Only interns with weak memories need monitors!" Asok says, "Please. I am having enough difficulty memorizing my calendar." Mordac asks, "Did you want any cheese with that whine?"
Thursday May 17,
2001
Tags #taking bribes, #from vendors, #feel guilty, #getting paid, #walk with cup, #looks harder
Transcript
Carol sits behind her desk. Wally approaches with a cup of coffee and says, "Do you feel guilty about taking bribes from vendors?" Carol replies, "No. Do you feel guilty getting paid to walk around with a coffee cup?" Wally walks away thinking, "I need a bigger cup so this looks harder."
Thursday June 28,
2001
Tags #more with less, #work smarter, #broadening focus, #doesn't mean anything, #excuse leaderhsip
Transcript
The Boss sits at the conference table next to Dilbert and Wally. The Boss says, "We need to do more with less." Wally raises his hand and says, "I propose that we work smarter while broadening our focus." The Boss says, "Wally, that doesn't mean anything." Wally replies, "Well, excuse my leadership."
Monday September 24,
2001
Tags #email service problem, #no email, #phone call, #playing with tech support, #three computers, #web function, #account information
Transcript
Dilbert is sitting at his computer at home. He says into the telephone, "Look, I have three computers in the house. All three simultaneously lost e-mail but not web function." He continues, shaking his fist in the air, "That means the problem is in your e- mail service. Can you grasp that concept?" Dilbert is laying on the couch with a cup of coffee. He says into the phone, "Okay. I'm re-entering my account information... Hey, guess what? That didn't work either."
Monday October 01,
2001
Tags #cloning the boss, #problem with clone, #dna module, #one half horse
Transcript
Headline: Cloning The Boss. Dilbert is dressed as a doctor, The Boss is lying on an operation bed. Dilbert says, "There's a problem with your clone." Dilbert continues, "Wally spilled soda on the DNA module. Your clone is one- half horse posterior." Dilbert continues, "And one-half that isn't like you."
Wednesday December 19,
2001
Tags #written objectives, #hidden objectives, #smothered with defectiveness
Transcript
The Boss says to Wally, "Wally, you have failed to achieve any of your written objectives." The Boss continues, "But by pure chance you achieved all of my hidden objectives." The Boss hands Wally a piece of paper and says, "Here's another project I need smothered with defectiveness." Wally responds, "I'm all over it."